Well this is frightening. See, you wanna scare kids into not doing stuff, this is what you need to use.
"Oh, you wanna smoke that reefer and hang out in abandoned buildings conjuring spirits? THIS is the consequence."
We could go back and put these guys in text books, make up fake police reports about people being attacked by them, and you could pretty much guarantee your kids will be better behaved.
"Look Timmy, stop hitting your sister or I'll take you to the woods and leave you for the Cave Crawlers." Timmy is instantly well behaved.
Children these days need stuff to be afraid of. They're not scared of the cops and they're not scared of their parents cause they'll call the cops on em if they get yelled at. But Cave Crawlers demand respect as they nibble your face off.
These frightening skull/spider thingys were created by Skinner. He sculpted them, and painted them, and even put little fresh water pearls in their eye sockets. As if that wasn't enough they even come with a few severed limbs and their own creepy cave dwelling just to drive home the point that these are some bad dudes. They are limited to 15 pieces for $100 each and go on sale at www.theartofskinner.com tomorrow (Wednesday, March 19th) at noon Pacific time. That's cheaper and less sketchy than getting your little spawn of Satan a lobotomy.