Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Designer Con Exclusives from 3DRetro



    Seeing these exclusives 3DRetro has in store for Designer Con makes me wish I was able to go.  But it's cool, I'll just be at work ignoring my responsibilities while perusing social media to see all the fun you're having.  And if you're not going just know you won't be the only one gently weeping into your cell phone.  Make sure you have a screen protector that's not cracked because tears of envy void the warranty.

     First up is this utterly stunning Jade Clairvoyant Dunny from J*Ryu and Kidrobot.  By far my favorite version of this figure, I first spotted this during New York Comic Con and it looks so much like actual jade you expect it to be cold when you touch it.  It's a beautiful piece of plastic that's limited to only 100 pieces and at $100 will be one of the big hits of the show.  Perfect for storing any ancient spirits you may have lying around the house that you just don't know what to do with.  And in case you're wondering it's never to early to shop for your favorite toy blogger for Christmas.


    Look at these little jawns from Gary Baseman!  Yeah, I said "jawns" because it is a part of my vernacular and soon midwestern housewives will be saying it the same way Beyonce made them profess that everything "slays", which is dumb by the way.  If anything was ever a jawn it would be these mini figures sold in blind packs of two (one of each figure) for only $4 each.  You can't pick the colors you get, but you can choose to eat one less convention center hot dog to afford them.


    I tried to skateboard when I was a kid but I had this really strong fear of falling and knocking out my teeth that prevented me from reaching my potential.  My fearlessness didn't kick in until my 30's and now I think it's fun to spend a week in the woods looking for bear just for the chance to watch them.  They're really impressive outside of a zoo setting when they're just doing their thing and wondering why some weirdo just traversed a hill to take their picture.    And of course now I can't skateboard because I don't heal as quickly as I used to and I don't want to be the old guy at the mall carrying around a skateboard that he obviously didn't just buy for his kid.  

    This guy's name is Moe Hawk (I see what you did there) and he was created by KRK Ryden.  Get one for $60 and live vicariously (and safely) through him.  



    This is Anesthesia, and she is rather haunted looking.  For real, this looks like it was found at an estate sale and is about to start up a five film horror franchise.  Which is why I like it.  Doktor A sculpted this lady and named her after the best sleep you'll get without having St. Peter look you up in his book.  And I loooooooooove a good patina, which this figure has plenty of to keep me happy.  I'm not sure how much it is but Designer Con only comes once a year so don't be a baby about financial stuff and think about how great it's going to look on your mantle.  


    All of this and more can be yours by visiting booth #532
  






    

Tuesday, November 7, 2017

Horrible Adorables Exclusives for Designer Con



    Horrible Adorables are bringing their whimsical road show to Pasadena, California this weekend to be a part of Designer Con and they're not coming alone.  Their car will not be getting optimal gas mileage because it will be loaded down with tons of soft critters ready to be adopted to collectors.   And speaking of soft do you see those squishy little dudes up there?  I've been seeing stuff like this in stores and I think they're supposed to help you release stress in a constructive way that keeps the cops from getting involved.  Just watching this GIF has made me feel more relaxed already, so this is some powerful stuff they have going here.  I wouldn't use one of these while operating heavy machinery.

 Take a gander at what else they'll have to offer and if you happen to be at Designer Con swing by booth #809 to say hello and buy one of everything:














Thursday, November 2, 2017

Simon Resin Figure from Creepy Hill



    This is Simon.  Despite his lack of muscle structure or skin he looks like a nice little dude.  I have no idea what his back story is, but I would imagine that he lives in a creepy old house that was recently purchased by a nice family.  Their youngest child, we'll say his name is David, is playing in the basement one day when a jar rolls out from beneath the staircase.  He picks it up, turning it over and over in his hands trying to see what's inside.  It is filled with a mysterious smoke that obscures his view, but being a young and curious boy he carefully unscrews the lid.  It opens with a pop and out springs a mysterious creature that is only a blur as it scurries back to the darkness beneath the stairs.  David is startled, even a little frightened, but he leans down and peers into total blackness.  Just then he hears the "click clack" of long boney fingers as they crawl across the floor towards him, and out from the void two huge, eyeless holes stare back curiously.  

     Ok, that's all you get until I secure my publishing deal.  I love the work of Creepy Hill and as you can see, I am very inspired by their latest figure.  Standing four and a half inches tall and made of resin, you can welcome Simon into your home in two different fashions.  For those of you like me who want to take things from the box and immediately put them on the shelf, there is a fully painted and assembled version for $129.  Or if you're more into the DIY scene there is a less expensive version that comes in two pieces and is completely devoid of paint for $80.  Either way, I love this little guy and you can too by visiting http://www.creepyhill.com.  




Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Leatherface 1/6th Scale Figure from threezero



    I've been into horror movies since I was a kid and in the spirit of Halloween I've been revisiting a lot of them with my wife.  Many of them are new to her because they were never really her thing, and watching them anew with her has given me a different perspective on a lot of them.  Even though some feature now iconic characters, the films themselves are not always that great.  Some are campy by accident, some on purpose, but as far as an actual scare factor most fall short.  That is, except for The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  I chalk it up to the way that it was filmed; like some gritty, horrible home movie that no one was ever intended to revisit.  The scenario is realistic enough that it makes you think twice before stopping in any town where the population is advertised as less than five hundred.  I'm beyond not interested in helping a family of cannibals achieve their food pyramid goals.

    The film looks real, so it only makes sense that threezero would put their famous attention to detail to work when recreating Leatherface.  Available for preorder now as an eerie 1/6th scale collectible figure, their online store has two versions for you to choose from.  There's the standard edition, which will still make your guests very uncomfortable when they come to visit, and their exclusive web edition which comes with extra accessories.  

     




Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Halloween Releases from Jermaine Rogers




     There's nothing like a graphic that comes prepared with every bit of info you could need about  new stuff.  At this point Jermaine Rogers has done all of the work to tell you about his Halloween releases, so I could just phone the rest of this in and go do other stuff.  I have trash that needs to be taken out that has developed an aroma unique of it's individual components.  There are always litter boxes to scoop, tumble weed-like hair clumps to sweep up, or my favorite past time of sitting in the shower and trying to come to terms with the fact that I have to go to work.  The hot water never lasts as long as my uncertainty.  So yes, while Jermaine Rogers has told you about both glow in the dark pins and even informed you about his glow in the dark resin figure, all of which will be available at 3pm eastern time today exclusively from www.jermainerogers.com, I still feel it is my duty to "spice" it up a bit, lest I be accused of taking the easy way out.  So here ya go:


    I'll chalk this one up as a success.  


Friday, October 27, 2017

Black Light Purple Baphomaniac from Martin Ontiveros x Toy Art Gallery




    "Whatcha gonna do brother,when Baphomania runs wild on you?"  No, seriously though, what would you do?  You think I was just asking that question because I love to partake in gimmick infringement and collect cease and desist letters?  Cause I don't.  I am worried about you and I don't want some evil entity catching you on the sneak and entering your body with bad intentions.  So here's some helpful tips to help you avoid demonic possession:

- Avoid all abandoned houses unless it is in broad daylight and you are with a priest.  With a gun.

- Avoid reading books that are bound in human skin.  Even though Amazon may offer then at unheard of prices, that free two day shipping just means you'll be in the Devil's clutches that much sooner.

- Listen to Taylor Swift songs repeatedly.  Demons may be evil, but they can only put up with so much.  I'll retract this statement if Ms. Swift were to sing me the Arby's menu in it's entirety.  The ball's in your court, blondie.  

  The life I save may be your own.

    If you were to invite forces of darkness into your life how about with something like this Baphomaniac figure from Martin Ontiveros and Toy Art Gallery.  Way safer than any relics dug up in the Middle East, this bro will bring delight/curses to all who touch his shiny vinyl exterior.  Available today (Friday, October 27) at noon pacific time for $80 exclusively thorough www.toyartgallery.com.





Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Acid Green 18 Inch Aliens Warrior from Super7



    Halloween isn't just about turning your lights off and pretending not to be home to prevent freeloaders from taking all of your snacks.   Nope, it's also about treating yourself to some new toys to make you forget about your seasonal depression and the ball of snot that has lodged itself in your head until spring.  Super7 is making it look a whole lot more like Christmas with this Acid Green Alien Warrior figure.  Standing 18 inches tall, this plastic beast will be going on sale Halloween day through www.super7store.com and their retail locations.   Tell the neighborhood kids to get jobs and buy yourself this instead of candy.