Halloween Releases from Plaseebo

    How has no one made an independent horror film with any of Plaseebo's creations?  If any of these three were after you, even if it was to just trying to return your cell phone that you left in a restaurant, you would not stop running until you died of exhaustion.  Then they would probably crawl inside your lifeless corpse and devour you from the inside out.  Especially the mouse looking one, he just screams "I'm feeling snacky for human flesh."  

    These three one of a kind figures will be available on Halloween at 12am eastern time only from http://www.plaseebo.net/.  Now excuse me while I got nail all of my doors and windows shut.  

Weird Ways In Which People Find This Website

   Haven't done one of these in a while, but when a few people out there have stumbled upon my website with such an odd search criteria, it deserves a mention.  Apparently, three of you found your way here by looking up "Zack Ryder Japan."  For those of you not familiar with the world of professional wrestling, Zack Ryder is a WWE Superstar who does have an impressive collection of wrestling toys.  Now whether he's been to Japan or not I have no idea, because for some reason we don't hang out.  Call me Zack, my readers demand it!  

Even More New Releases from Mutant Vinyl Hardcore

    My wife won't let me have this toy.  It's my own fault really, cause when I first saw Zug the Troll he wasn't wearing his fancy loin cloth and his twigs and berries were hanging out for all to see.  I made the joke that if I got one of these I would, every so often, snap a picture of his ding a ling and text it to my wife.  Here's how it would play out:

Sharon:  I miss you.

Me:  I miss you too.  But you know what else?

Sharon:  What?

Me: "troll ding a ling pic"

Sharon: I'm not speaking to you.

    It's kind of like the next level of Deez Nuts jokes and I thought she would be proud of me coming up with such a great innovation to a classic that also involved our toy collection.  Now I'm gonna have to buy her shoes.  

    All kidding aside, this new figure from Mutant Vinyl Hardcore is pretty intense.  Dude looks like he would have no problem gnawing the meat off of your bones if you dared to pass over his bridge.  He's making his debut tonight in both painted and unpainted versions.  And you don't even need to enter a lottery to get one.  All you have to do is visit http://store.mutantvinylhardcore.com at 8pm eastern time and pray that your Wi-Fi holds up.  

    Oh you thought that was all?  Nope, cause tomorrow night Sam Heinous makes his once per year appearance.  Also releasing at 8pm eastern time, this guy looks hellbent on bringing the tricks rather than the treats (Didn't that sound like I could almost work for Buzzed there for a second? )  I have a feeling a lot of people's credit cards are going to be screaming for mercy by the time this week is over.

Tricky Cats Blind Boxed Figures from Kidrobot Releasing Tomorrow!

    As you may or may not know, I have a few cats.  Not that you could tell from all the pictures I post on Instagram, or the patches of hair that stick to my clothing not matter what I do.  I love those little buggers and they certainly make life more interesting, like the fact that you never know what state of disrepair your house may be in when you return home from work.  Or if you'll roll over on your side trying to get comfortable in bed and find a hair ball staring you down as if it's ready for a turf war (That happened two nights ago and as proof that I'm totally getting better with not being freaked out by germs I just rolled the other way and went back to sleep.  I was reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaallly tired and was hoping it was maybe just a hallucination.  SPOILER ALERT: It wasn't)

    Just in case you had a pile of kittens turn up in your backyard and you're trying to place them in loving forever homes, I'm gonna have to let you know that we are as overcrowded as America's prison system.  The only cats we are currently accepting as new residents are of the plastic variety who respect that sanctity of antique furniture and carpeted staircases.  And lo and behold, we have some fitting candidates here in the form of these new Tricky Cats from Kidrobot.  These things are so freakin cute you'll be tempted to use your small animal/human baby voice as you tickle their wittle bellies.  

    These are packaged blind boxed, so just like real kitties you won't know what you get until they become adult bobcats and you're in your closet, cell phone in hand, begging animal control to come and get the thing before it finishes you off.  You only make that mistake once.  These will be available starting tomorrow, October 30th, on www.kidrobot.com for $9.99 each.  I call dibs on the Halloween dude.  

"Rotten Gourd" Marbled Sludge Demon from Mutant Vinyl Hardcore Available Tonight

    Very few things in life make me happy.  There's my wife, my cats, cable television, grilled meat products, Slurpees, professional wrestling, and marbled vinyl.  God I love toys that are made with a multiple colors of plastic.  They give me a special feeling deep down in my soul each time I gaze upon their beauty.  You can't tell me you're not in love with these Sludge Demons from Mutant Vinyl Hardcore the way I am, and I'm so in love with them that I won't ever tell my therapist about it because he may try to have me committed.  

    I sure don't!  Especially being that these beauties are dropping tonight at 8pm eastern time over at http://store.mutantvinylhardcore.com.  There will be unpainted versions for $75 and painted ones for $85.  They don't let you have access to the internet or your credit cards in the nut house.  At least that's what I heard anyway, it's not like I've been or anything.  Stop judging me.  

Lonely Dark Lady TQ from 3A

    I'm still pissed at George Lucas for going back and putting that garbage into the original Star War trilogy.  Especially being that the computer generated nonsense added exactly nothing to the films other than the feeling of fine grit sandpaper in my undershorts.  But this figure from 3A has given me a great idea for something to change in The Empire Strikes Back.  You know that pivotal scene where Vader tells Luke that he is his long lost father?  Let's revise it a bit:

Vader:  "Luke, I am your father."

Luke:  "No. That's not possible."

Vader:  "I know, right.  And to be honest I left you and your sister not to focus on my evil career, but to become the person I always knew I was inside."

     Vader then rips off his bulky outfit to reveal his new, streamlined, ladies body.  His light saber becomes a stripper pole and he flaunts what his space credits bought him.  

      End scene.

     You know that's a Robot Chicken sketch waiting to happen.   Hit me up Seth Green, and let's make sweet magic.
               
    October 30th is the date to get your hands on this 1/6th scale beauty from 3A and the only place to do that is http://www.bambalandstore.com.  Your childhood will never be the same.

Check Out This New Figure From Javier Jimenez: Dorobanii the Jackalope

    Since the dawn of time, people have ben obsessed with sticking animals together to create new ones.  It's kind of a weird thing to do, but people seem to get a kick out of it.  From the Fiji Mermaid, which is half monkey half fish, to two-headed monstrosities featured in sideshows, we just can't get enough of tinkering with critters.  One of the cuter biological mashups of there is the jackalope, which for the uninitiated is a rabbit with antlers that can be found stuffed and ready for sale in all the best roadside souvenir shops throughout the american southwest.  Thankfully, someone has finally created a much more adorable version that doesn't require a two parts roadkill and one part super glue.

    Javier Jimenez's latest creation is this adorable little jackalope named Dorobanii.  You can check out his whole backstory by watching this video:

    He is available as we speak in the two different versions you see above.  There the regular edition, and a special Halloween edition that is limited to only 15 pieces.  These little resin dudes are only available from http://www.stickupmonsters.bigcartel.com.