Tuesday, October 29, 2019

Alien Phantom Ultrus Bog from Skinner x Lulubell Toys




    The biggest let down of this year has got to be the Storm Area 51 event that resulted in absolutely no one seeing those aliens.  Now as someone who values my freedom/life there was no way I was gonna show up to help, but you can't tell me there aren't a ton of Internet dudes hopped up on energy drinks and other questionable substances that could have made it happen.  Hell, half the state of Florida makes the news for much crazier reasons than this, so I was sure something exciting was gonna happen.  But apparently no one wants to see me happy, which seems to be a running theme.  Stop being so selfish!


    If it's any consolation I'm sure the aliens are nowhere near as awesome as Ultrus Bog.  They are probably all sickly and wouldn't even understand any of the memes you'd want to show them. Skinner's  Ultrus Bog gets all the current meme references and looks forward to seeing all the ones you text him while at work.  He looks awesome in the crazy marbled vinyl pour from Lulubell Toys and tons of people are gonna want to bring him home.  Only 30 pieces were created with the Alien Phantom color scheme and they are up for grabs begining Wednesday, October 30th at 6pm pacific time.  He retails for $125 each plus shipping and can only be had at www.lulubelltoys.com.


    

Friday, October 25, 2019

Resin Skellene Mourning Doll from Miscreation Toys



    I love going to estate sales, mostly just to have a look at how other people lived. Going through their house is more fun than actually buying anything, especially when you're competing for items with people who have eBay on their phones and search for everything they come across. Estate sales are the real world equivalent of the "followers" tab that Instagram just took away, that gave you a look into what deviant things your friends were up to. Some of ya'll are freaks and you know it.

    On occasion I have found interesting items while digging through the dead's former possessions, but I never find anything quite as exciting as this Skellene Mourning Doll. I'm expecting to every time we enter a new house, but I'm usually greeted by the deceased's poor investment in Beanie Babies or stacks of pastel colored '80's mixed media art that I wouldn't waste a match to burn. Is it that people are beating me to all of the haunted items or have those movies featuring murderous dolls that come to life scared enough of us away from the idea of inviting one into our home? I explicitly buy things with the idea of it creeping out anyone who happens upon my estate sale but I'm nothing if not a humanitarian.

    Miscreation Toys is of course turning this young lady into a larger vinyl figure, but she will be making her debut in resin courtesy of DuBose Art. Each five inch toy is masterfully marbled the way only a toy possessed by restless souls could be.  Each figure is completely unique and is a deal at only $55 plus shipping.  Add some Victorian era creepy to your life when these go on sale today, Friday October 25th, at 7pm eastern time from https://autopsybabies.bigcartel.com/.


Wednesday, October 23, 2019

George's Halloween Portrait Vinyl Figure from Tara McPherson x Martian Toys




    People in the future will one day search the internet for various moments that stand out in our history when looking to prove a point to someone they're arguing with. Search engines of tomorrow will be tasked with retrieving information about various wars, celebrities of note, and other factoids that that will run the gamut of the human experience. One day, someone will type in "name a moment in our past when the paint on a toy was completely nailed" and the picture about you will inevitably appear.

    Martian Toys has outdone themselves on this latest offering from Tara McPherson. I've been collecting her figures for years and I will go out on a very stable limb and say this is the best looking paint any of her toys have ever had. I saw the prototype at Five Points and of course was into it, but the colors are so spot on to the original painting and add so much life to this figure that it's impossible not to gravitate towards it. I'm beyond impressed at the production work, and if you feel the same way you can preorder one for yourself starting this Friday, October 25th. Get in early, because the price will only be $200 up to November first, after which it jumps to it's normal retail cost of $250. And you're getting a lot for your money, because it stands a foot tall! Get yours at www.martiantoys.com.



Thursday, October 17, 2019

Death Goldblum the Gore Fly Kickstarter from Evil Dave




    When you've tired yourself out watching pimple popping videos and cyst removal the next logical progression is watching a bot fly get yanked from someone's festering skin.  It really has everything you could ever want:   There's the horror that the person is raising an insect baby in their flesh and they are really not exited about being a parent.  And there's a second person who is going to do the removal and whose excitement level is directly proportionate to their lack of medical training.  And let us not forget the botfly larva itself, whose tiny little black spines are hell bent on staying knuckle deep in their seemingly endless food source.  Armed with little more than a pair of tweezers and a cell phone camera the magic is beyond anything Kubrick could have dreamed up. 


When a man is known as Evil Dave, you can bet he's not dreaming up unicorns and rainbows.  Enter Death Goldblum the Gore Fly, whose appearance is absolutely as advertised.  He's buzzing around on Kickstarter now in the hopes of becoming a vinyl toy, but he needs your help to make that dream a reality.  Check out the link here, snag some rewards, and bring this turd eating insect to life.



Thursday, October 10, 2019

Gold "Choices" Vinyl Figure from Jermaine Rogers




      A rabbit with a thousand yard stare and a kitchen knife is the perfect spirit animal for my week.  Sharon and I started binge watching Mindhunter and we finished season one and have dipped our toes into number two. And you can't watch that many fictional representations of actual serial killers without giving everyone you encounter a second look.  Whether it's been the grocery store or at work I've been staring at each person I encounter looking for signs of deviant behavior.  Thus far I have only diagnosed a creepy kid in Wal Mart who was following a group of girls and staring at them from afar in every aisle they went down. It turns out that it was one of their brothers, so I'm glad I excercised restraint and did not use deadly force to apprehend the suspect.  The next life I save may be your own, or something.

    This bunny may not have done bad yet, or he may be contemplating continuing an otherwise unheralded reign of terror, but either way he is a compelling character from the mind of Jermaine Rogers.  He's eight inches of pure vinyl and limited to 100 pieces in this gold colorway.  You can add a dose of potential mayhem to your collection when he goes on sale this Friday October 11th at 3pm eastern from www.jermainerogers.com.




Friday, October 4, 2019

A Smattering of New Releases from Violence Toy



   When a company has a name like Violence Toy its fairly indicative of what their products will entail.  I myself am a fan of getting right to the damn point, which is something rare when you work with the public.  The quickest point between your problem and my solution is a straight line, but for some people they have this overwhelming internal monologue that demands to come out.  It happens so often I don't even have concrete examples, as my brain goes into safe mode and refuses to reboot until you have finished the story about the crazy traffic you encountered earlier or the fact that your daughter just got out of rehab and doesn't she realize that she's gonna have to get a job so she can pay you back for having to take her pet snake to the vet? I wish I was clever enough to make up half the crap people willingly tell me.


 So it seems I didn't get right to the point in this post, thus making me appear a bit hypocritical.  I shouldn't hold you up any longer than it takes to drool over all of these new releases because unless you are on the Violence Toy mailing list, then you have no idea what time these will be available.  I can tell you that it will be sometime today, which is Friday October 5th.  And I can tell you that they will be available at https://violencetoy.com







Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Silver DeathCat from Deathcat Toys x Toy Art Gallery




    Do you remember the movie Clash of the Titans?  I'm talking of course about the original, not the crappy remake one from a few years back.  It's one of my all time favorites and other than the three original Star Wars films, the only one I'd watch repeatedly without getting tired of it.  Recently I was discussing cats with someone and they asked how I ended up with five of them and the best way I could think to describe is was the way the Gods presented Perseus with the various weapons in the film to complete his task.  Everything was placed strategically so he couldn't help but find what was intended for him and I feel the same way about the little critters that wake me up at 6:30 every morning demanding to be fed.  They were intended to enter our lives at that exact moment and all we had to do was scoop them up and take them in the house.  Ok, so we managed to do that with one of them, the others didn't make it that easy, but you get my point.  Especially the one who wedged himself behind the car engine and required four hours and a tow truck to lift the front of the car to get him out.  It would have been easier to fight the Kraken.

     Deathcat Toys and Toy Art Gallery are set to release another of the former's mascot figures in silver sparkly sofubi.  He stands at four and a half inches tall, looks meaner than a snake, and will be available starting today at 3pm eastern time for $45 each.  That's way less than we spend on any of the three prescription foods that we feed our little buddies, who decided its way more fun to have individual dietary needs than to come together and share the same one.