Friday, December 4, 2015

Weedian "Leaf" Edition from Sleep x Arik Roper x Unbox Industries



    There's some music out there that demands to be played in a room filled with black light posters and pot smoke.  It was most likely conceived that way and will only make sense to someone who considers that a staple of their lifestyle.  Sleep's "Dopesmoker" album's title track is over an hour long  journey into the recesses of space and time and is the sort of thing you would listen to when you are contemplating the existential crisis you are currently faced with in your line of work.  Or when you just want to get stoned out of your mind and pretend you're a space wizard.  Same difference.

    What I picture when I hear it is a soundtrack to these Tusken Raider-like dudes trekking through the desert, searching for some far off destination they will never quite reach.  Are they putting their anger fueled past behind them, journeying through a metaphysical wasteland on their way to a higher (pun intended) existence or are they just trying to get away from crazy old dudes wielding laser swords?  

    Arik Roper created the art behind this stoner rock classic and Unbox Industries has brought it to life in 3D form.  This guy will be available for sale starting tonight from http://store.unboxindustries.info for $85 each.  




Thursday, December 3, 2015

New WWE Pop Vinyl! From Funko





   "Let me tell you something, Tony Schiavone, people have themselves a lot of opinions about a lot of things.  Some people think Nickleback makes listenable music.  Some people think Nicholas Cage would have made an awesome Superman.  Some people, Tony Shiavone, actually acknowledge the Star Wars prequels as having happened.  I know, it's disturbing to contemplate.  But even the most misguided person can't look at themselves in the mirror and pretend they're not jealous of John Cena's   jorts.  Admit it, you wish you could rock a pair of denim shorts with half the conviction he does.  It would make summer clothes shopping so much easier if they were a possibility, cause I've got meaty thighs and they just don't have a section in JCPenny that caters to my man legs."

    I just dropped the sickest promo on you right then.  Any minute now Vince McMahon is gonna call me and shower me with cash.  So before that happens I should probably tell you about these new WWE Pop Vinyl! figures from Funko.  You will soon be able to own Paige, The Ultimate Warrior, and the aforementioned John Cena.




Mini Mockbats from Paul Kaiju x Unbox Industries Releasing Today!!!




    Paul Kaijus's Mini Mockbats are releasing tonight via Unbox Industries which is good cause I've been mad jealous at all the pictures I've seen of them from Designer Con.  They're so dang cute and look like they would sit perfectly in the pocket of my work shirts.  Then when someone is being unreasonable I could pat him on the head and say "shhhhhhh little buddy, we're going to try and handle this one without the hatchet."  Customer service issues would be solved in a matter of seconds.  See, people have the belief that no one that they're dealing with will just snap on them, thus making them act much more unreasonable in these type of situations.  But if you put it out there that their attitude is revealing a dark twisted side of you that may or may not take advice from a toy in your pocket, people might think twice about demanding to return something they bought four years ago but swear they never used and want to speak with a manager right away because obviously you can't give them the satisfaction they demand and are just continuing to waste their time which is by far more precious than the time they are wasting of yours as they continue to spew nonsense.  It's never happened to me, but I've heard stories.

   These little bros will be on sale today/tonight sometime over at http://store.unboxindustries.info.  Each figure is $40 and sold randomly, so you can't pick your color.  They all look good to me so I'd be happy with any of them.  

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

You Know You've Been a Heathen, So Get Yourself a Krampus from Goodleg Toys




    I know you've been bad all year and it's not just cause I've got one of those drones with video recording capabilities that just happens to be wherever you are while still respecting the average retraining order distance just in case.  Actually, that would totally explain how I know, but I also know because you read this website.  You could be looking at pictures of baby animals, or learning how to fix your broken washing machine, but here you are, reading about goat men and laughing at the thought of them beating snotty little children.  It's why I love you.

    Goodleg Toys is offering up 3 different versions of everyone's favorite holiday devil this Saturday, December 5th at 6pm GMT over at http://goodlegtoys.storenvy.com.  Pick the one that's right for you and decorate a little differently this Christmas.  Now if they'd only make a giant inflatable version I could put on my lawn.

    

Monday, November 30, 2015

Candie Bolton x Toy Art Gallery Have Something Massive Planned for 2016



    I don't usually write about toys that are in production unless they have a release date and pricing info.  I'm one of those people that if I fall in love with an object I don't want to know that it's coming one day because I want it right then.  But I've seen pictures of this thing pop up online a few times and it is so different from anything out there I had to heap a bunch of praise on it while still in its clay form.  

    Candie Bolton and Toy Art Gallery are going to release this beauty known as Bake-Kujira.  Scheduled to release in early 2016, this 11 inch tall figure is the representation of a phantom that comes into existence whenever a human kills a whale.  If Captain Ahab had thought this would be the result of his triumph, Moby Dick would have been a mere pamphlet about how everyone took up bass fishing.  

    Until it is officially available for purchase you will have these few images to stare at and wonder just how amazing it's going to look all painted up.  In my mind it is glorious and I've already ordered it.  



The Dream Big Friends Kickstarter from Bigshot Toyworks is Live!



    There's nothing that pulls on your heartstrings quite like little dreams.  I just finished reading a book and all one of the characters wanted to do was grow up and work in an office.  Oh, you mean like the first office on the ocean floor or something right?  Nope, just an old boring office with a fax machine that makes a hideous noise and a copier that eats toner like a Christmas ham.  Mind you the girl was a clone who was only around so her organs could be harvested to keep regular folks alive, but still, have you heard of a dream that was smaller than that?  It depressed me.

    Yuna has much bigger dreams, specifically that she wants to own a commercial rocket company and to visit Mars.  And she loves cats, which makes her pretty awesome in my book.  She is the brainchild of Bigshot Toyworks and the folks behind Uglydolls, Sun Min Kim and David Horvath and is intended to fuel a child's imagination through focusing on the world around them.  And yeah, it's a little different than the stuff I normally write about, but I have two nieces and I'd rather them grow up and feel that anything was possible rather than be consumed by whether their make up looks good or if their clothes are on trend.  

   Yuna needs your help though if she is to inspire girls around the world.  Right now there is a Kickstarter campaign to help fund the production costs needed to make her a reality.  For only $40 you can get one of these 10 inch dolls featuring real clothes and her little cat buddy, Kamata.  There are other reward levels as well that include button packs and graphics for your wall and every little bit goes towards making this happen.  They have a lot of money left to raise so visit this link, pledge what you can, and give girls out there a positive roll model to look up to and dream with.  




Thursday, November 26, 2015