Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Sons of Anarchy Mystery Box from Mezco



     Good lord did you watch Sons of Anarchy last night?  Talk about emotional.  I won't spoil it for you in case you have it stowed away on your DVR because you were somehow unable to make time for it when it originally aired (what were you doing that was more important?).  And it's killing me a little on the inside because no one I work with watches it (they're bad people) and I wanna talk about it soooooooo badly.  Especially the brilliant scene when Jax and Nero are talking on the phone.  Uggh just call out sick and go watch it.

     If you watch Sons of Anarchy I'm guessing you're a person that spits danger in the eye.  You don't just live on the edge, you dangle from it with one hand while taking a selfie with the other.  You need a surprise at every turn, and that's why the S.O.A. Mystery Box from Mezco is for you.  It's kinda like gambling, but without the shame of signing over your Ford Focus when the Eagles fail to cover the spread against the Packers.  I'll miss that car.

     For $20 you get two official Sons of Anarchy products.  What will you get?  I don't have the slightest idea, but that's what makes it exciting.  Seven lucky people that order one of these will get an upgrade to a box featuring everything you see pictured above.  That's one for each season the show has been on the air, in case you're ever on Jeopardy.  Order yours from http://www.mezcotoyz.com/.  

Friday, November 14, 2014

Own the Final Battle Rat Colorway from Mike Sutfin




    I always get a kick out of spotting a rat whenever Sharon and I are in New York.  Not only are they the most famous rats in the world, but it always surprises me to see wildlife in the city other than pigeons.  The ones you see are still kinda cute, even though they're covered in muck and would probably steal a hamburger from your kid's mouth while leaving behind a healthy dose of plague.  But you always wonder whats lurking around in the abandoned subway tunnels and sewers that people don't get to see.  Rats that have evolved beyond anything we would ever want to imagine.  Maybe they look something like this.

    Mike Sutfin's Battle Rat is one bad rodent.  At least he gives off that air of badness by dragging that skull around.  It's pretty much the best method for conveying that you are not to be messed with.  You might want to leave it out of your profile pic on your dating website though.  It's best to wait until the third date to bring up your love for carting around the decapitated heads of your enemies.  

     This dude is the final colorway ever of this figure and is up for preorder right now at http://sutfin.bigcartel.com/.  He features some pretty intense paint techniques and you can interchange the heads to suit your moods.  And he's much safer than trying to tame one of those critters you find rifling through the trash in Manhattan.  You only make that mistake once.  

    




Super7 x Secret Base Soft Vinyl Alien Pre-Order



    These vinyl Alien figures have been nearly impossible to get and have left a lot of people with no alternative other than to bang their heads into a wall until the part of their brain that wanted one to begin with is bruised into forgetting.  Trust me, it's far less painful than seeing everyone you follow on Instagram post pictures of all the fun things they're doing with their Aliens, while you sit at home nurturing that growing void in your heart.  Stop your bellyaching cause Super7 and Secret Base are making everything ok with this open edition figure.  What that means for you is that you have from tomorrow until November 30th to preorder this glow in the dark bro.  They will be made to order so everyone who wants one will get one.  No more paying ridiculous eBay prices or having to patch forehead size holes in your living room.  


Thursday, November 13, 2014

"New Maps of the Abyss " featuring Arik Roper x Skinner at The Cotton Candy Machine




    Art doesn't have to suck.  Art is not all about some weirdo glueing a screwdriver to a urinal, or those crappy prints that you're forced to stare at in your doctor's waiting room.  It should make you feel something, whether you just like how something looks, or whether it makes you want to charge into battle, double fisting a couple broad swords, while "Reign in Blood" is blasted from the heavens.  If the latter speaks to your Lord of the Rings-loving soul, then do I have the place for you to be tomorrow night.

    The Cotton Candy Machine in Brooklyn is presenting "New Maps of the Abyss" featuring the work of Arik Roper and Skinner.  This is gonna take you back to the time when you were hiding in the basement in your Iron Maiden t-shirt, playing Dungeons and Dragons with your friends.  These are your most vivid fantasies, your darkest fears, brought to life and ready to hang on your wall.

    The event starts at 7pm and both artists will be in attendance.  

Shagghoulies from We Become Monsters



    I've said it before and I'll say it again:  Not enough people wear fuzzy suits.  I'm not talking about those furry people who like to dress as animals and touch each others butts and stuff.  They make me reaaaaaallllllly uncomfortable.  I used to work in the mall and this family would come in and they all went to those furry conventions and wanted to talk to me about it which made my skin crawl.  They also looked like they might of had a "Hills Have Eyes" living situation going on, but that's something else entirely.  Have you ever noticed that attractive people aren't into stuff like that?  You never see anyone roaming around Wal Mart with cat ears on their head that you'd like to picture naked.  

    What I want people to start wearing are business suits that look like they were created from the remains of a dead Muppet.  How much more fun would it be to get fired by a guy (or girl, I'm all for women in power and whatnot) firing you while looking like Oscar the Grouch?  You couldn't even be that mad.  

    I'm digging We Become Monster's latest creations, the Shagghoulies!  If they're isn't already there should be a horror-themed rock band with that name.  I don't know if these guys have any musical talent, but they look like fun.  Only 8 of these dudes were ever created and they will be unleashed upon an unsuspecting world this Friday, November 14th, at noon Pacific time for $75.  They stand over a foot tall too, so that's a lot of fuzzy toy for your money.  Get yours at http://webecomemonsters.storenvy.com/.



Wednesday, November 12, 2014

"UnAmerican Activity" Custom Toy Show at Toy Art Gallery



    It's rare that I would ever open an email with a subject that involved the word "unAmerican" cause I am not trying to get on some government list or have the feds parked outside my house trying to see what I'm up to.  Not that I'm up to anything, but it just seems like a hassle.  I'd have to step up my style game if people are gonna be outside taking pictures all the time to go in my permanent file.  This is how their briefing on my case will play out:

 Boss:  "So, have you determined what the deal with this guy is?"

Cop:  "Sir, all we've been able to ascertain is that the house is filled with cats, and the subject looks FABULOUS!" (throws glitter in the air, much to the chagrin of his fellow officers)

    And that is how I will waste the taxpayer's money.  End scene.

      I opened that email anyway and instead of finding something that would send me to Guantanimo, I found out about a killer toy show this weekend.  It's called "UnAmerican Activity" because the artists involved aren't from America.  Oooooooooooooh, that makes much more sense than what I was worried about.  The show opens this Friday, November 14th, at Toy Art Gallery and features the work of Jon-Paul Kaiser, Doktor A, and Seymour Art.  Check out this little preview of what you can see live and in person:








"Center for the Performing Arts" Building Set from Citizen Brick



    Law school is expensive, and what's a girl to do when she wants to be a district attorney and the student loans just aren't covering it?  Citizen Brick is known for making the building block sets that a certain company would never even dream of creating.  Now you can make it rain on little plastic strippers without ever leaving the privacy of your own home!  Usually that costs a lot of money and you have to burn the pants you wear after you sober up and/or see the performer of your lap dance in natural lighting.  There's a reason these places are dark.  

    Impress your friends and forgo the feeling of needing a hazmat shower with your very own Center for the Performing Arts.  This thing is beyond amazing:  it comes with four exclusive figures, working led lights with batteries, and is made using the same techniques that the big guys use, so this thing is completely legit.  For $275 think of the endless fun you will have without having to worry about the strength of your immune system.  Seriously, have you ever been in a strip club that didn't resemble a third world country? Order yours now and it will ship out Black Friday.