Outsmart Originals Labor Day Sale

    I don't wear shirts when I write because I will not have my creativity restrained by the garments of man.  That, and my cat Wednesday is always sleeping in front of the closet and I feel bad when I wake her up.  Just look at this face:

    Precious right?  Ok, back to business.  Outsmart Originals makes cool shirts designed by toy dudes.  And right now they are running a Labor Day sale for 50% off everything.  That's a sale that could even get me to wear clothes!!!!!!

http://outsmartoriginals.storenvy.com/

B.A.S.T.A.R.D. 3 Packs from Triclops x Unbox Industries

    Are you ready for uber sick wrasslin action?  If you had to think about it then you're not ready and should probably go and reevaluate your life, because it's about to get crazy in here.  

    Triclops and Unbox Industries are proud to present these 3 packs of their super sick B.A.S.T.A.R.D. keshi inspired figures.  I'm so pumped up about this, I'm gonna walk to my neighbor's house and punch him in the face.  Don't worry, he had it coming for those weird barnyard noises he and his mutant girlfriend were making at one in the morning.  Seriously, it sounded like two injured donkeys on a trampoline.  He's about to feel the fury of my knuckles as they reorganize the bone structure of his pudding face.  

    Ok, so these are three packs which mean you get three figures.  The math is sound there my friends.  You can choose between either yellow or pink and the third figure will be an orange Bullet Belt figure from Skinner!!!!!  I have one of these and it is sick, easily the best little guy I have in my collection.  each pack is only $12.50, which is a great deal.  After I beat my neighbor up I may steal his wallet and buy a few to help ease the pain and suffering I've been through as a result of his improprieties.  Get em now from http://www.unboxindustries.info.

Red Panda Edition of BearAll from RhymeSquare

    Oh snap son, I can see your kibbles and bits!  Good thing this isn't a family website, or I may get letters from upset parents.  But since this website is viewed mostly in prison libraries, I think I'll be ok.  Plus, I'm not big on apologies anyway.  I hate it when celebrities act badly and then they go on tv and whine about how sorry they are.  What they should do is start to apologize, then say something offensive and kick over the camera.  If I were ever famous that's what I'd do.  Or just read a Wikipedia article about ferret breeding as my "prepared statement." 

    This is BearAll, the company mascot of RhymeSquare.  For those of you without your ears to the street, RhymeSquare is a clothing company started by toy artist extraordinaire Jon-Paul Kaiser and Chris from Great Scott.  This resin Red Panda edition will go on sale tonight at midnight GMT and will be on sale through Saturday at midnight or until they sell out.  And they always sell every one, so be quick or be left without a naked bear.  

http://www.rhymesquare.co.uk/

Translucent Creature from the Black Lagoon by Mezco for NYCC

    I've been wondering when we would start to see the exclusives for New York Comic Con and this is the first one I've been able to find.  And what's great about it is that you can preorder one right now and have it shipped to you if you aren't able to attend.  Mezco has made 100 of these 9 inch Creature from the Black Lagoon figures in translucent green.  This sucker has 11 points of articulation, so displaying him could be kinda fun.  He could terrorize your other toys, or make out with them, or whatever you want to do.  Order him right now by going to http://www.mezcotoyz.com/. 

Red Pollen Kaiser from Paul Kaiju x Toy Art Gallery

     This is one of those toys that I haven't been able to buy yet but I really want.  He looks like he would oversee slaves working in a salt mine, which is my preferred aesthetic for toys.  This is of course the mighty Pollen Kaiser from Paul Kaiju and he will be available in this fancy new red paint job tomorrow, August 30th, beginning at noon Pacific time from Toy Art Gallery.  

New Minions from Skinner x Paul Kaiju x Lulubell Toy Bodega

    When I am sleeping and my cat Icarus decides he wants attention, he will sit on my nightstand and poke me in the arm.  Evidently this was not effective the other night, because I woke up in a panic after he put his entire paw in my mouth.  He was seriously elbow deep and it startled the crap out of me.  It was four in the morning and since I wasn't going to be sleeping again any time soon I got up to use the bathroom.  Everything in that department is going fine, that is until I look in the bathtub.  For those of you that don't know, Icarus has a habit of eating just about anything, especially if it's gross.  There, in the bathtub, was clear evidence that he had been fishing in the drain.

 With his paws.

That were just in my mouth.

     I've only had my mouth washed out with soap once, and that was after I cursed at my mom when I was five.  And she had the decency to not use liquid soap.  But it's what I had, so I made do.  I leaned my head back and pumped it straight in like I was a college kid downing a can of spray cheese.  It took some time to wash it all back out, but I felt it was worth it to prevent my death from whatever evil had been brewing in that tub drain.

    I'm sure I missed a few germs, and I picture them to look kinda like these guys, throwing a rager in my belly that would make Andrew WK blush.  These guys were made by Skinner and Paul Kaiju and are available exclusively from Lulubell Toy Bodega.  For $55 you get em both, which is a deal because I have to buy more soap.  Pick em up tomorrow, August 30th at 11am Pacific time from http://www.lulubelltoys.com/.

Drab Future from Brad Isdrab Releases Friday

    I've said it many times before, but I love the fact that people are making their own toys.  That way they're not limited by what a company is willing to produce or what some marketing dude thinks will sell well.  They take their own ideas and bring them to life just for the sake of doing something cool.  

    This is the world of Drab Future created by Brad Isdrab.  The title pretty much sums up the feel of these figures, as they have a very post-apocalyptic look to them.  The thing that stands out about them is how the characters themselves have a weathered and decayed look.  It takes them from being figures in a world that is dying around them into being artistic representations of their state of affairs.  I especially like the brown, almost rusted look of the girl pictured above, as she reminds me of the bodies that were found in Pompeii perfectly captured in ash.  She looks as if the apocalypse has come and gone and that her form will remain as a visual testament to it.  

    These will also come in full painted versions and raw castings that will allow you to paint them however you wish.  Get them this Friday, August 30, through the Zerofriends store at http://www.zerofriends.com/.