Friday, September 30, 2016

NYCC Exclusive "JaWabbit" from Flat Bonnie x DKE Toys




    Jawas are the most underrated characters in all of the Star Wars universe.  Those little dudes are cute as hell and they help keep the galaxy clean by recycling all the junk they can into cold hard space credits.  They're like that guy who comes through your neighborhood every week on bulk trash day with his pick up truck looking for scrap metal, except with waaaaaay less prison tattoos.  They are just as likely to cut you though, cause I've never met a short dude in a hoodie that didn't have a temper. 

    Flat Bonnie has taken everyones favorite little intergalactic hustlers and turned them into adorable plush bunnies.  Seriously, these are so cute I could punch myself in the face.  DKE will be selling these exclusively through their New York Comic Con booth #423 next week and they're limited to only 30, of which I want every one.  I have a greed problem.  

NYCC Exclusives from Renone x Tenacious Toys


   
    Renone has been burning that midnight oil and breathing in those resin fumes as he gets ready to drop a menagerie of exclusives at New York Comic Con.   The only place to find them (or him if you happen to be there Thursday) is at the Tenacious Toys booth #309 in The Block, which is where the cool kids hang out, fyi. 








Thursday, September 29, 2016

Death Dealer Labbit from Frank Frazetta x Frank Kozik x Kidrobot




   This is the most metal designer toy to ever exist.  Not like basic girls giving the metal horns because pumpkin spice is back in season; I'm talking men in an ancient world battling the onslaught of demons as they spill forth from a great chasm in the Earth.  I'm talking about reading Lord of the Rings and wishing that it was real life and how much better it would be to raise an army against evil rather than stocking another damn shelf at the Wal Mart only to have people not control their little heathens as they tear the place apart.  Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.  You've already got the power chord heavy soundtrack playing in your mind and the thunder in your heart and you're ready to set a fire, roast a mythological creature, and feast at a table made from the bones of your enemies.  I just got myself way too hyped.  I always do that, then I have to go about my day pretending I'm not thinking about cleaving punks in half with a broad sword.  My therapist is gonna have fun with this one.



    Worship at the feet of Frank Kozik's interpretation of Frank Frazetta's legendary Death Dealer.  He is mounted on his mighty Labbit steed and is ready to send any and everyone on a nasty trip to the afterlife.  Open your home to the darkness when this beauty is released on Friday, September 30th from Kidrobot.  We are not worthy.

Produced by Bigshot Toyworks.  

Sea-Borg Mutations Wave 2 from MonsterPants




     None of us are perfect, but it's our flaws that make us who were are.  Like, if you were missing an eye, people might call you "Cyclops Bro".  Or if you had a trash truck run over both your legs and ended up in a lawyer commercial talking about it you'd be this lady:



    That commercial makes me laugh every time I see it.  Seriously, it's absurd but I cant help it.  I even showed it to everyone I work with and they thought it was hilarious too.  I mean, there's the fact that the trash truck ran over her legs, which is kind of a funny way to get yourself injured.  And how did she end up laying on the road so a trash truck could even do that?  Did she drop her keys in the gutter?  Did a raccoon steal her keys and run into the gutter with them and she was lying there with a turkey club from Subway trying to bribe him to return them?  And her voice is so sad and pathetic and I just can't help it but then I worry that laughing makes me a sociopath, which only lasts all of two seconds.  The worrying part, not the laughing.  I'm still laughing as I type this.

    Imperfections can be awesome, just like these Sea-Borg Mutations from MonsterPants.  They're created from miscast parts, color tests, and other bits of randomness that gives each figure his own unique personality.  Bring these delightful freaks into your life when they go one sale Thursday, September 29th at noon eastern time at this link.  I wonder if she got Terminator legs after the accident?  If so I think I should go into hiding.


Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Bigshot Toyworks Exclusives for NYCC


 

     Bigshot Toyworks never fails to deliver a diverse offering of items when they make an appearance at New York Comic Con, but this year they've got everything from a half dissected black metal gnome, to a familiar looking fried chicken baron, to a jacked up unicorn that's more pit fighter than Lisa Frank notebook cover.  Check out some photos of what will be available and pay them a visit at booth #309 during the convention.





The Debut Release of Javier Jimenez's Maneko Wananeko Resin Figure



   You can never have too many cat toys.  You can also never have too many $100 bills , or tacos, or friends with a sweet hook up.  No need to thank me for dropping some life knowledge on you like that, I like to share what I learn from spending hours on the internet every day.  I guess I could have talked about the presidential debates, but I chose to watch wrestling instead, which is oddly more believable than the nonsense happening in my country right now.  Back to cat toys before I get bummed out about it.

    Javier Jimenez has taken his Wananeko character into a new, miniature realm with this sculpt.  Standing at 2 and 1/2 inches, this resin kitty is available for preorder right now from this link.


Tuesday, September 27, 2016

NYCC Exclusives from Rampage Toys x Tenacious Toys




    Jon Malmstedt is moving his Rampage Toys operation from Japan back to the United States and his first stop is gonna be at New York Comic Con.  He'll have a ton of exclusives available at the Tenacious Toys booth # 309 and these are just some of what you'll be able to score.  He'll also be bringing more with him when he makes an appearance on Saturday.  Check out the pictures and start saving your lunch money.  Or steal someone else's and that way you can eat and have money too.  That makes more sense.





Monday, September 26, 2016

Hooverville Labbits from Frank Kozik x Kidrobot




    You need proof that times are still tough?  I made a joke in a post once about selling a kidney and I got legitimate solicitations from a dude in Africa willing to act as the surgeon/middle man.  He sent me a link to his clinic's website which had a surprising number of goats wandering around outside of what was termed "the operating room."  Now call me a germaphobe if you will, but one goat inside a hospital is really one too many if you think about it.  And I love goats and would be excited to see one just about anywhere else that didn't involve putting a gaping wound in my body.  Plus airplanes are uncomfortable enough as it is without trying to recover from major surgery on one, unless they started stocking those little drink carts with morphine when I wasn't looking, but I doubt it.  They won't even give you the full can of soda, like that extra bit is gonna bankrupt them.

    Being broke doesn't mean you have to be depressed all the time.  Just check out this Hooverville Labbit from Frank Kozik and Kidrobot.  Dude may be traveling down a rough path but he's just happy to be alive and doing his best to keep a positive outlook on his future.  He's available right now in a vintage colorway and in blazing Technicolor orange that can be found exclusively on www.kidrobot.com.



Thank You For Making Me a Finalist in The Designer Toy Awards




    I just wanted to take a moment and say thank you to everyone who nominated me to be a finalist in The Designer Toy Awards and for voting for me to win as Best Blog.  I found out about the nomination while I was traveling all last week so I didn't have access to do a proper post about it, but I am beyond grateful for all of your support.  While it would be very cool to win, the greatest reward a writer can ever receive is having others read their work and enjoy it and everyday I am beyond thankful for that.  Jesus, that was sappy.  And it's not like I couldn't go back and edit a fart joke in there somewhere rather than go on a stream of consciousness rant where I type everything I'm thinking.  I should probably go take a shower before my wife comes home from work so I can at least fake some form of productivity today.  This is kinda like when you know you have to be up early for something important so you try real hard to go to sleep and you try to clear your mind of any thoughts but then you start wondering what it is about jazz music that is appealing to people and the next thing you know you didn't sleep at all and you have to try not to hallucinate while you're doing your important thing but then you kinda nod off and have one of those half asleep/half awake dreams and you're not sure if you just yelled something really dumb out loud or it was just part of the dream. What were we talking about again?


Friday, September 16, 2016

Mixed Parts Madness from Splurrt X Lulubell Toy Bodega




    SAAAAAAAATUUUUUUUUUURDDAAAAAAAAAYYY!!!!!  Did you read that in your head like I was about to announce a monster truck rally, because if you did you are awesome and we are friends.  I got way too pumped listening to a song from the new Darkthrone album and now I'm just trying to type out all these rage feelings I've got and turn them into something informative for you.  Did you know that the dude from Darkthrone accidentally got himself elected to his town's council in Norway after he posted a picture of himself with his cat and said "don't vote for me?"  I wish he was eligible to be our president instead of those two other clowns.


Change I can believe in.


   Splurrt is dropping some more Cadaver Kids and Mecha Cadaver Kids through Lulubell Toy Bodega on Saturday and this time they're all mixed up.  I'm usually not a huge mixed parts fan but the colors he chose are so different on these that I dig em.  They will be $50 and $55 respectively and will go on sale promptly at noon pacific time (September 17th) only from www.lulubelltoys.com.  These will be gone in the blink of an eye so forget whatever else you were planning on doing and camp your behind in front of a computer ready to pull the trigger.  

Thursday, September 15, 2016

"Ethereal Apparition" Bake-Kujira from Candie Bolton x Toy Art Gallery




    Brothers and sisters, can I get a moment of silence for every other toy in your collection.  Cause the moment you put this stunning piece of work next to them they will all straight die, r.i.p.  This is not only by far the most amazing paint job I've seen on Candie Bolton's Bake-Kujira to date, but this is my favorite on a toy I've seen in a long time.  It looks like a mysterious antique you would find in a dead relative's attic who during their lifetime was a world traveller and collector of artifacts.  Inside would be contained the spirit of some mythological creature peacefully at rest until the time you were able to decipher the text written on the underside.  Never decipher any text written on the underside of anything unless you are prepared to deal with the consequences.  I believe mythological creatures fall under the same leash law as dogs, so keep that in mind.

    This figure is so amazing that Toy Art Gallery is holding a lottery just for the chance to purchase one.  You know you want to enter, because if you don't there will always be this void you feel inside of you that is impossible to fill.  No one needs that, so here's how you do it:

    ETHEREAL APPARITION Edition retails for $250 and will be released via email lottery starting on Friday, Sept. 16th at 12PM PST and ending on Monday, Sept. 19th at 12PM PST. Email sales@toyartgallery.com with “Bake-Kurjira Lottery” as the subject along with your paypal address and shipping info. If selected you will be sent an invoice for payment. Please allow 24 hours for a response after the closing time (Monday 12PM PST). Winners will be chosen at random, one entry per participant please (if you submit more than once you will be disqualified). Good luck!

   Seriously, this thing is so beautiful that I'm at a loss.  I will however go ahead and call this my favorite toy of the year.  Yeah, I know there's still a few months yet but that's how secure I am in my opinion.  I don't flip flop like a politician, but I do accept gifts/bribes/spiritual offerings and this would be a perfect place to start your shopping.


Tuesday, September 13, 2016

First Full Color Release of "The Worst" Action Figures from Super7



    Let me tell you, when I was a wee lad there was nothing better than finding a good stream and taking all of my GI Joe figures there to play.  I'd spend hours refining the landscape and setting up epic battles and just the thought of it makes me want to go outside and do it again.  How come it's taboo for a grown man to want to play with action figures?  I bet the world would suck a lot less if we did. Hell, we've convinced adults that coloring books are therapeutic, so why can't you play with toys outside without the neighbors thinking you're a freak?  

   There's only so many times that you can take Cobra Commander to jail, allow him to be rescued, and start the whole process all over again before you start to question his abilities as an evil villain.  That's where The Worst come in.  They are comprised of the most sinister evil doers known to mankind and are ready to tear things up.  But I know you can't choose just one of these bad bros from Super7 to add to your collection, and on Wednesday, September 14th just before the stroke of midnight you won't have to.  Because you can get all six carded figures for only $90.  These things demand to be opened and played with, so you'll probably want two sets so you can continue to admire the killer artwork by Ed Repka in their original, unspoiled state.  Get em at www.super7store.com.


This dude is by far my favorite.

Monday, September 12, 2016

Toys R Us Exclusive New Day Pop Vinyls Available Now for Preorder

    New...Day Pops!  New...Day Pops!  Oh, don't you dare be sour cause these New Day Funko Pop! Vinyl figures are up for preorder right now!!!!!  Sold exclusively through Toys R US, this three pack featuring your WWE world tag team champions is set to release the first week in October, but you can secure your set right now, with free shipping in the US, by visiting this link.  Not owning them would be booty to the highest degree.  Booty to the nth power.  So booty that you could not recover from it, as there is no known cure for terminal bootyitis.  So if you don't get them go ahead and alert your loved ones now so they can make your final arrangements.  This whole thing just took a really dark turn.  


Friday, September 9, 2016

Frank Kozik x Frank Frazetta "Labbit The Barbarian" Print from Kidrobot



    You know who doesn't decorate their walls?  Weirdos.  I bet Ted Bundy never put so much as a Jimi Hendrix poster on his wall and look where that got him.  Luckily for you I am here to help you avoid traveling down that same dark road by telling you about this killer (no pun intended) poster from Frank Kozik.  This is of course inspired by his epic "Labbit the Barbarian" collaboration with the late great Frank Frazetta, which is the most manly piece of vinyl this side of a Manowar record.


Old Spice has taken it too far. 

    Increase your property value when this print goes on sale later today through www.kidrobot.com.  





Pink GID Calliope and Stingy Jack from Kathie Olivas and Brandt Peters

 

    Oh my goodness I know ya'll got paid today and are trying to get rid of that dirty cash cause that stuff is filthy and there isn't enough hand sanitizer in the world to clean those kinda germs but you can't just spend it on anything lame like school supplies so I'm here to help.  See, I'm pretty much an expert in making other people money and also helping them spend it.  Neither is a great mutant power, which is why the X-Men never return my calls, but their loss is your gain cause then I have time to find things like this for you.  I also haven't slept for days.

    Look how pretty that swirly pink vinyl is on these Stingy Jack and Calliope figures.  And it's not just decorative, cause those suckers glow in the dark!  It's an added bonus that will hopefully intrigue your cats while you're trying to sleep at night so they stop biting your toes.  You can get these two figures from Brandt Peters and Kathie Olivas when they go on sale later today at noon pacific time from www.circusposterus.com or n person at Stranger Factory.  They're limited to just 32 pieces of each, which is nuts.
    

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Preorders Available Now for Ragnar The Metal Gnome from Jason Freeny X Bigshot Toyworks

 


    I just posted about this a few days ago and the gods have shown their favor towards you as preorders have now started for this killer figure.  The world's of Jason Freeny and Bigshot Toyworks collide in the most metal creature to ever stand guard over your vegetable patch...RAGNAR!!!!  Only 200 pieces exist of this beautifully dissected bro in this colorway and he's only $65, which is a steal for something this brutal.  Seriously, he's more brutal than what your mom's meatloaf does to my digestive track whenever I visit.  Woman needs to learn about take out.

   Secure him for your collection by visiting this link.  

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Preorders Are Open for Huck Gee's and Mighty Jaxx's Gold Life Figures




    When I heard the phrase "Gold Life" I had images of living like a rap star with gold teeth and chains and maybe a 24k platted car that would one day get repossessed cause of that nightclub incident and the ensuing lawsuit that wiped out my fortune.  Of course I would make a pretty gangsta comeback by doing commercials for strip mall colleges that help you becomes a medical assistant and by being a clue on Jeopardy, all of which will rebuild my street cried and lead to my resurrection tour and my ability to catch up on my child support payments which the judge wouldn't lower even when times were tough.  Then soon after once I have regained my former glory I will OD on Sprite and cough syrup and then my hologram will go on tour and I'll keep releasing albums that were supposedly recorded before I died but I'm just low key dropping tracks from the grave because the peace from death has given me mad time to reflect and tighten my lyrical approach.  Not that I've thought this through or anything.

   In reality The Gold Life is a a world created by Huck Gee that is way more feudal Japan than early '90's Compton.  The first three figures from this new series are being produced by Mighty Jaxx and are available for preorder right now from just about anywhere that sells designer toys.  There's three different figures and at only $25 each it would be a crime not to get them all.  Not like a felony or anything, but still a crime.



Friday, September 2, 2016

Limited Edition Dissected Gnome from Bigshot Toyworks X Jason Freeny



    I was reading that the other day in Iceland a road crew had to go out and unearth a boulder they accidentally covered up because it pissed off the elves and they were taking their frustrations out on anyone who got close.  Not only did they dig it back up but they also pressure washed it to restore it to its former glory.  That would never happen in America because first we would have people fighting on Facebook as to whether the elves existed or not.  Then some idiot bureaucrat would figure out how much they owed the country in back taxes and send them a bill. Congress would probably pass legislation about which bathrooms they would be allowed to use, and people would have hunted them and made elf taxidermy earrings to sell on Etsy and none of this would have really been an issue to begin with because we would have taken their elven lands and put a strip mall there a long time ago.  I think I was meant to live in Iceland.

    I love the elves and their gnome kinfolk.  And I love black metal.  And I love anatomical gross stuff.  Has Bigshot Toyworks been camping out in my mind in an effort to create the perfect hybrid toy featuring all of my interests?  If somehow they could have worked cats and cable tv in I would have straight died of shock.  Not only is this metal loving gnome dude finally becoming a reality, but Jason Freeny has hacked off a section of him to let us all see his inner self.  This is the type of brutality that anyone starting a black metal band should aspire to, as setting fires and wearing corpse paint just isn't gonna cut it after seeing this.



    Only 200 pieces of  this dude will exist in the world and they will be up for preorder very very soon and also available at New York Comic Con and Designer Con it seems.  Keep up to date by checking out www.gnome.world.