Peruse the SDCC Wares of Frank Kozik

    By this time next week all of the attendees of San Diego Comic Con will be bankrupt and suffering from what is called the "nerd flu", which is transmitted by being stuffed like sardines into big convention spaces.  But don't worry, it's rarely fatal.  Once your germs stop arguing about whether or not Star Wars is superior to Star Trek they usually just move on about their business.  Frank Kozik will be there trying not to get sick while selling you lots and lots of neat stuff he made, like these Clockwork Carrot figures.  He's got some of the originals left for $125 and the new Supervillian edition for $145: 

    Or maybe you're more of a bear person, I don't know your life!  Check out this matte black Dim Bear for $145 with awesome gold beat down chain.  

    Do you like adventures and mysteries, cause William, Henry, and Reginald here look like they're about to do some exploring/sleuthing that will probably lead to epic hijinks and other words you won't ever use in a sentence in your daily life.  This is the Heart of Darkness edition, which leads me to believe their quest will take them beyond the family friendly realms of PBS and into the seedier underbelly of HBO.  For $110 you can make up your own gripping tales of suspense, intrigue, and scandal!

    Ooooooh I like this.  Heathrow is looking like a rare treasure in clear blue vinyl.  And he is pretty rare, cause only 50 of these were made and they will be $40 each.  

    Ahhhh more clear blue vinyl!  Look how it shines like the Hope Diamond.  And it's probably equally as cursed.  I think I need a light box to display my clear toys, cause this setup is just too nice.  This is that wow factor that people will see when they come into your home and make them forget all about the cat smell.  25 of these sets of Hateballs were made and can be yours for $65.  

    Are two Hateballs just too much commitment for you?  Do you not feel you'll be able to love them both equally and show them the attention they need to flourish in this cold hearted world?  How about you stick with one big one that glows in the dark.  He's unpainted and will run you $40.  If you buy enough of them you could hang them from your deck and create party lights.  If you have any friends that would come to a party, which I don't and no I don't wanna talk about it.  

    The future is kinda stupid isn't it?  It's mainly stupid cause we'll miss out on most of it.  Sure, we'll get to see the immediate future, like lunch time and whatnot, and we'll get to see what remains of the future until our mortal bodies give out like broken down flesh sedans, but the way way future is completely lost to us.  It's a complete rip off.  At least we don't know what we will be missing, which is nice.  Plague victims were never like "Damn, guess I won't be around to Tweet or take selfies."  I need to get more sleep.  

   You need a lavender resin Gipper in your life.  Just trust me, it's all part of the bigger picture.  Only 50 were made and they cost $40.  

Visit Frank at booth 5051 starting today!

SDCC Exclusive Shub Zeroth from Metacrypt x DSKI One

    People are always asking me for advice on how to woo the fairer sex.  Actually, no one has ever asked me that, but I'm gonna tell you anyway with an example from this past Sunday.  First, my wife and I drove out to the boondocks of Pennsylvania to do a bit of antiquing.  There's nothing women love more than buying dead people's treasures.  Gets 'em all in the mood for romance. Next we ate lunch at our favorite spot in the continental US that serves German food.  After gorging ourselves on piles of meat we then headed home to watch the WWE wrasslin pay per view.  And that my friends is not only how you show a woman a good time, that is how you stay happily married.  If they aren't impressed by a date like that you should cut your loses and leave them on the side of the road because it's obvious they're terrible people.  

    This San Diego Comic Con exclusive Shub Zeroth reminds me of some good antiquing with that nice patina he's sporting.  I'm a sucker for a good patina, and I want this dude pretty badly.  I would not be opposed to showering you with praise if you buy me one.  Metacrypt made him, DSKI One painted him up, and he will be available at 1pm Thursday at the Lulubell Toys booth # 5047.  They will also have some unpainted grey versions and some green and white severed heads that are fun for kids to play with.  If anything doesn't sell (which would be stupid of all of you attending) it will be made available at Brian Ewing's booth # 4503.  

3A SDCC Exclusives Online Sale

    I haven't once complained about not being able to go to San Diego Comic Con.  I've never been before, so it's not like I had any expectations of attending.  Plus, most of the exclusive stuff makes it's way online one way or another.  The folks at 3A are ensuring that you aren't missing all the fun that comes with waiting in line for hours at a time by releasing their exclusives this Wednesday, July 23rd, at 11pm Hong Kong time.  These are the amazing toys they'll have available, and you can buy them separately or as a bundle package that will save you a few dollars plus get you an exclusive poster (that is, if you're an existing 3A member, cause membership has its perks). They're not guaranteeing how long the sale will go on for or how many of each will be available, so if you want em you better cancel your plans and make your new home http://www.bambalandstore.com/.

SDCC Exclusive NekoFukurou by Jeff Soto x Blackbook Toy x DKE

    You know why these are great?  You don't have to answer cause I'm gonna tell you.  These are more than just toys: they're uber functional design pieces that you can change with your mood.  There's a cat on one side, an owl on the other, and they come in two different colors.  You can mix, you can match, you can drive yourself absolutely crazy with the possibilities.  And they're hollow, so you can get all DIY and put a little LED light under them.  Or those awkward photos that your best friend knows to burn in case you ever turn up dead.  I'm not here to judge.  

    Jeff Soto and Blackbook Toy created these and they will be another DKE exclusive at San Diego Comic Con.  I'm not allowed to have these because it would cause me to have a melt down trying to decide how to display them.  They're just teasing my obsessiveness.  

SDCC Exclusive Transformers Box Sets from The Loyal Subjects

    The best thing about having been a kid in the 80's and 90's is that everything I loved will always be reinvented in cool new ways.  The toys I played with and the shows I watched are constantly getting revamped for a new generation of folks and that makes it new for me again.  The Loyal Subjects are, in my not so humble opinion, the reigning kings of nostalgia.  They've taken so many classic franchises and put their own spin on them to make them fresh.  Just look at how amazing these Transformers 3 packs are.  They are exclusives to San Diego Comic Con, but being that they made 500 sets of each, you might be able to snag them afterwards.  Not that you should chance it if you have a ready and willing mule that can get them for you at the convention.  I've toy muled before and it's kinda fun.  You feel like you're doing something dangerous, like any minute the cops will show up and strip search you for contraband.  I'm living on the edge baby!!!

The Mythicals Kickstarter from Monster Factory

    Who else is angry that the world isn't filled with real live mythical creatures?  Seriously, we've packed this place with humans who, let's be honest, kinda suck sometimes.  Where are the unicorns, and griffins, and dragons?  I want to go the zoo and see a chupacabra, or be able to go to Scotland and pet the Loch Ness Monster.  I don't care about driving a Ferrari or being a professional wrestler (wait a sec, I totally care about that one) I just want to live amongst the great critters of literature.

    Monster Factory is doing their best to fill the world with the magic of our imaginations with their new line of Mythicals plushies.  These feisty Canadians have started a Kickstarter campaign to make your life just a tad bit snugglier (is that a word?  it is now) with these three little dudes.  Of course I'm a bit partial to my boy Cthulhu there, but the other two are equally as cute and are less likely to enslave us all.  Just kidding, he would never do that, just look at that face!  If you follow this link you can score yourself one or more of these guys while you help them become a reality.   

SDCC Exclusive Shadow Ralf from Craola x 3DRetro

    This looks like something that would be in one of those creepy stop motion films and surprise, it is.  Greg "Craola" Simkins is creating a short called "I'm Scared" and this little dude is part of it.  Is he what we're supposed to be scared of, cause he kinda freaks me out a little.  He's like a little dead Batman that would knock your dishes out of the cabinets while you slept.  

    Shadow Ralf stands a full 6 inches tall, will cost you $70, and is a San Diego Comic Con exclusive for 3DRetro.  You can meet Greg on Thursday from 1pm-2pm, have him sign your figure, and ask him about the film and if there are things more scary than this guy in it.