The Debut of James Groman's Brachiosaurus from Toy Art Gallery

    If zombie dinosaurs roamed the Earth, would they have still been around until we invented ways to kill them?  This is the pressing question of our times, or at least this very moment as we gaze upon the debut of this Brachiosaurus from James Groman x Toy Art Gallery.  Of course, it is possible that the zombie dinosaurs would have wiped us out before we had the chance to realize that you have to hit them in their pea sized brains for it to be effective.  Now I'm freaking out about zombies evolving to have tiny heads thus making them nearly immortal.  I need to start going to bed earlier.

    Cast in a beautiful red vinyl, this eight inch tall lizard features five points of articulation, which would be just enough to not be able to do a damn thing about a giant meteor.  Available starting today (Friday, August 18) at noon pacific time, he can be yours for $125 only from www.toyartgallery.com. 

Long Night Edition Luna from The Bots x UVD Toys

    Thank God people weren't toting around cell phones with cameras when I was going through my goth phase.  Plausible deniability is much easier when no photographic evidence exists, and me telling you about it is way less horrifying than seeing it for yourself.  Thankfully I moved past that time in my life well before middle age hit, because looking like Robert Smith from The Cure is not even a good look for Robert Smith.

    Luna is channeling her dark side in this exclusive colorway from The Bots and UVD Toys.  Limited to just 75 pieces, $60 will not only get you the toy but also a matching enamel pin.  Procure yourself one at http://uvdtoys.storenvy.com.

Help Luke Chueh Turn His Art Into Animation

    Believe it or not I almost made a cartoon once.  My wife and I were working with this local dude who had a production company and we came up with ideas for something that would have been pretty awesome.  "Would have" because the dude flaked out on us and stole most of our ideas to use in another one of his projects, which actually aired.  I would be mad about it, but his life turned out to be pretty crappy afterwards so I feel like that's the universe having our back on that one.  Karma is way cheaper than trying to hire an attorney.

    Luke Chueh has dreams of turning his famous characters into an animation and he is on the cusp of it happening.  As of this writing his Grief Encounters project is 97% funded, so now it's up to all of you to give it that final push.  There are only a few days left but tons of great rewards still to be had, like the above 1000% resin Possessed statue.  Or if that's a little rich for your blood there are smaller versions in vinyl to be had that are exclusive to the campaign:

    Munky King also has versions of his Hung and Prisoner figures that are dying to hop in a shipping box and be mailed to you as soon as you pledge your support.  Check out this link and let's help make it happen.

      

Satanic Spaceman Glampyre Lottery from Martin Ontiveros x Toy Art Gallery

    So let me get this straight:  you have a chance to not only own one of these sweet Glampyre toys, but they've been hand painted by the man behind the design, Martin Ontiveros?  And this eight inch figure looking like Dracula joined the Kiss Army is only $150?  I may not hit the Powerball, but this is the next best thing.  You would wish I did hit a jackpot like that, because I would quit my job in such awesome fashion it would absolutely break the Internet.  I've already got it all planned out, so keep me in your prayers.

   Speaking of lotteries, the only way you can own one of these limited edition dream boats is by entering one.  From now until Monday, August 14 at noon pacific you can email sales@toyartgallery.com with the subject line "Glampyre Lottery" along with your PayPal details and shipping address. Then cross whatever you can for good luck so you bring this beauty home.

Death Goliathon Lottery from Planet-X Asia x Cop a Squat Toys

    Jane Goodall never hung out with monkeys that looked like this.  All of her primate buds had only one head and certainly didn't look like they took radiation baths every morning. You will not find him in any zoo, placing his paw against the glass in an effort to connect with visitors on some deeper level.  Nope, this is a freakish Planet of the Apes-style secret military monkey whose only interest in you is using your bones to pick his teeth.  He is full of pretty colors, though.  

    Planet -X Asia has enlisted the help of Cop a Squat Toys to paint up a limited run of only 6 of these bad monkeys.  The things are freakin huge so you might want to go to Home Depot and reinforce your shelves before you enter the lottery to purchase one.  Here are the details if you want in on this behemoth:

    All you must do to enter the lottery is be a @copasquattoys follower on Instagram and comment “I’m in!” on the photo 

    Price will be $300 + shipping via USPS Priority.  The winners will be drawn on Friday. August 11th.

Blue Draculobster from Michael Skattum

       I was totally gonna write about this season of Game of Thrones but I don't want to be the dude that spoils it for those that haven't watched any episodes yet.  I'd be pretty heated if someone ruined it for me so I'll refrain from wondering too much about how slowly the army of the dead is moving in their attempt to get beyond the wall.  It's not like a kid who doesn't have the use of his legs totally got to where he was going and had time to rest up and spit prophesies.  I bet the undead formed a union and now they have to take regularly scheduled breaks.  Or maybe their bladders have all shriveled and they have to stop to pee constantly like that one time at New York Comic Con where I was trying to pass a kidney stone and I had to go every 10 minutes.  If you're ever peeing blood the most awesome thing you can do is not flush the toilet so the guy after you has something fun to talk about with his friends.        

    This Blue Draculobster from Michael Skattum (aka Draculazer) and Gums Productions totally reminds me of one of those White Walkers.  Except for the lobster claw and his utter disregard for clothing.  You can bring this ten inch vinyl toy home today for only $85 which includes shipping from Honk Kong, which is where giant lobster people live.  Snag one at http://www.michaelskattum.com before they sell out.


     

Resin Reptillian Madball from Magitarius

      When I was studying forensics in college one of my textbooks had a picture of a dude who had taken copious amounts of illegal substances, sliced his entire face off with broken pieces of glass, and fed his fleshy bits to his dogs.  While the picture was pretty horrifying, the real victims were his puppies who now have an unrealistic expectation of what treat time should look like.  Good luck trying to appease them with a Milk Bone after that.  

    Sometimes when you tear your face off the results are way more neat-o than some basic muscle and bone; sometimes you reveal yourself to be a reptilian overlord.  The folks at Magitarius will make you wonder what your friends are made of with this resin Madball-style release.  Limited to nine pieces, this accurate depiction of the people that run our country are available right now for $55 each (shipping included) by checking out http://www.magitarius.com.