Thursday, December 18, 2014

Milky Purple Slugbeard Lottery from Paul Kaiju x Toy Art Gallery

    My wife and I have a black cat named Icarus who has a bit of an eating disorder.  He likes to ingest anything from shoe laces and string to loosely woven fabrics.  One time he ate half of a shirt sleeve and had to go to the emergency vet to have some help in passing it.  We lock up all of our shoes and clothing and anything else we think he might decide to nibble on.  But sometimes you can't help what he decides is gonna taste good, especially if it's something you didn't bring into the house.  

   We first met Icarus when he was a kitten and he became lodged behind the engine of my car.  Four hours later and with the aid of a tow truck lifting the front of the car, we were able to liberate him from his automotive prison, and hoist him above our heads for the gathered crowd to see (picture the Lion King with more grease).  Needless to say the experience was rough on him and he wasn't too into being social, and by not too into it I mean he wouldn't let us touch him for six months.  He loved our other two cats but he was kind of leary people.  Slowly he began to socialize more and more with us; coming up to us to pet him, sitting near us on the couch, etc.  This is when we began to notice his weird eating habits, which we attributed to his traumatic experience of having been trapped for who knows how long underneath the car.  

    One night he was playing behind the couch and we started to hear this weird slurping noise.  We figured he had gotten into something we missed and was now making a meal of it.  I pulled the couch back to take it from him and witnessed, what is to this day, the weirdest thing any of my cats has ever tried to eat.  There, laying on the carpet, was a slug with the back half of its slime sucked clean off of his body.  My wife asks me what he has, and I tell he she doesn't want to know (she thinks slugs are the grosses things in the world) but she looks anyway.  I'd never seen her move so fast to get as far away from something.

    The moral of the story is my cat tried to eat a slug and my wife would probably object to me owning anything named Slugbeard.  But look how pretty Paul Kaiju's monstrous creation looks cast in a milky shade of purple.  I think she'd be able to look past the name don't you?

    Toy Art Gallery will be holding a lottery to give you the chance to buy one of these pretty behemoths.  Starting tomorrow at noon pacific time and running through December 22nd at noon pacific, you can send your pertinent details (PayPal address, shipping info) in an email to with the subject line "Slugbeard Lottery".  Then you cross all your fingers and toes and hope the toy gods smile upon you.  If you win, you have to pony up $165 (which is a steal considering how freakin huge this thing is) and then wait patiently for the mail to come.  No early or multiple entries suckas.    

No comments:

Post a Comment