Chipmunks are about the cutest little thing you can have living under your porch. Trust me, I've got a little family of them and they come out and stuff their little cheeks with all the birdseed that falls on the ground and they're just adorable. I don't even mind the series of holes they've dug all around as they seem to be expanding their living quarters/constructively trying to undermine the integrity of my porch to which it will inevitably collapse as I stand upon it. Then I will go tumbling like Alice down into a subterranean world where the chipmunks speak english and have set up a democracy that runs better than any we could have imagined.
It could be worse, because I could be infested with Molezillas, or even worse the dreaded Molezilla-X!!!!! They dig holes that could swallow a Volkswagen and they feed on neighbor children, which is their lone benefit and as far as I see it a community service. This is another insane custom from the mind of Plaseebo and features led lights that mimic the souls of the aforementioned neighbor children as they scream for you to release them from their hell. Just ignore it, they'll tire themselves out eventually.
Add this 8 inch tall monstrosity when it goes live on www.plaseebo.net Thursday, July 28th.
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