Arsenal of Artists "No Toon Left Behind" Group Show at Suburban Vinyl This Saturday

    Do kids watch cartoons anymore?  I remember looking forward to Saturday mornings all week, not just because I didn't have to go to school, but because all of the best shows were on then.  Not that I have kids of my own mind you, but I picture them today glued to their smart phones and being consumed with auditions for the next season of Teen Mom.  Kids are the devil.

    Arsenal of Artists wants us to remember the simpler times, when the minds of children were more focused on Scooby Doo and less on being emotionally stunted by the internet.  Playful Gorilla and Cash Cannon have put together a massive group show called "No Toon Left Behind" that celebrates the innocence of waking up early on your day off as a youngster and being glued to the tv.  Just look at the list of artists participating:

    

    Thank you to whoever made this graphic cause I would have gotten a blister trying to type all of those names.  This thing is taking place on Saturday at Suburban Vinyl in New Jersey and from the amount of work that will be on display I'm wondering if they had to expand just to fit it all in there.  Find out for yourself while taking a sweet nostalgia trip.

Plaseebo To Unleash Vinyl Madness This Friday

    I am convinced that the work of Plaseebo could transport you into an underlying world where the mad visions of HP Lovecraft are the norm and its all your brain can do not to explode upon witnessing it.  Everything from the paint schemes to the glow in the dark elements to the LED lights work together to conjure up visions of things that cannot be unseen.  Or they just look really cool in your display case and I am the victim of an over active imagination.  Either way, they're still mesmerizing to look at.

    Tomorrow, August 14, there will two new one off custom figures released in his shop.  The first one you see up there consists of Plaseebo's own Gnaw head mounted on Skull Head Butt's X body, and containing a motion activated LED light that changes color.  Signed and dated, that sucker will be available for $350.

    The other part of this release is this AntiChrist 666 figure from Frank Mysterio.  He's filled with tons of guts and 3 motion activated LED lights to make this guy shine like the unholy terror he is.  He also comes signed and dated.  Both of these custom figures will only be available from http://www.plaseebo.net.

Kozik x Kidrobot's Tribute to All Things Delicious

    I am usually against posting sneak peaks because they lack all of the important details you, my very intelligent and quite attractive readers, need to make an informed purchase.  Today, I make an exception for all things that are both delicious and made of chicken.  Never have I loved something that causes me so much intestinal distress as I love KFC.  Even though I haven't had it in years (for my own health and that of public restrooms in Southern New Jersey) I can still taste the Colonel's original recipe like I just housed an entire bucket of deep fried heaven.  And let us not forget those delicious biscuits that they never give you enough of.  Fill a bucket up with those too my friend, and let us feast like peasant kings!!!

    I've been following the developments of Frank Kozik's chicken man ever since he first posted up the beautiful 3D sculpts from Bigshot Toyworks, and now it looks like Kidrobot will be producing these suckers in the very near future.  Just look at these renders below and tell me with an honest heart that you don't want this:

    See, you couldn't do it cause then you'd be a liar, and liars don't get any chicken in my house!!!  Let's bring a familiar friend back to tell you just how I feel about this toy:

    Yes I do little otter buddy. Yes I do.  

"My Pet Gurgle" Custom Autopsy Baby from Topheroy x Miscreation Toys

    

    Dear God this is frightening.  This is like all those dead baby jokes coming back to haunt you for telling them.  I'm lucky enough (or unlucky depending on how you look at it) to seemingly have instant karma, so any time I say something I maybe shouldn't have it usually results in me injuring myself a few seconds later.  So I'm not worried about a zombie baby hiding behind a dumpster, just waiting to gnaw through my chillies, cause if it was gonna happen it would have a long time ago.  I still may walk a bit further away from them though, just in case.

    The Autopsy Babies from Miscreation Toys are enough to scare the skin off of you by themselves, but with this tribute to everyones favorite monster from the '80's, that freakish level has somehow been elevated.  Topheroy is the man behind this haunted looking doll and if you've got the intestinal fortitude to have one in the house with you there will be 10 of them available this Saturday, August 15, over at http://customantics.bigcartel.com.  They'll be $200 each and come with a metal chain and removable eyeball, just like my uncle Jeff.  

Skinner Puts a Hex on The Iron Monster from Miscreation Toys

        I've been thinking about building my own Iron Monster for a while now.  I've been saving all these soda cans, so I guess he's gonna be more of an Aluminum Monster, but that makes him sound kinda weak.  I figure if I layer the cans thick enough he could withstand a pretty brutal attack.  There's also the problem of bringing him to life, which I'm really not sure how to do.  I found some local witches I thought could help but all they wanna do is volunteer at the Renaissance Fair so they can get free admission.  I'd totally pay for them to get in and take em to The Cheesecake Factory afterwards if they could conjure some rotten old souls to inhabit my monster, but it's starting to look like they don't have the witch skills I require.  They need to be more specific in their Craigslist ads.

      You know Skinner don't need no witches to bring his toys to life and strangle your neck meat in your sleep, cause he's got paint infused with ancient demon blood.  That stuff's expensive, but look at how it shines!  These Iron Monster figures from Miscreation Toys have been given the special Skinner treatment and will be unleashed upon the world this Friday, August 14, at noon pacific time.  Only 6 of these will be available and will probably sell out in less time than it took you to read this.  Try your luck at www.theartofskinner.com.

Cinema Monster V Coming Wednesday from Splurrt

   Oh man, True Detective gave me ALL the feels last night.  What a great, yet heartbreaking, season finale.  You know I'm not gonna spoil it for you, cause I'm no jerk, but after watching it I am totally comfortable is saying that this season was better than the first.  I loved the first season, except for the ending which I thought was a disservice to what they built in previous episodes.  But this season really felt like it worked itself towards an inevitable end.  The characters were digging a tunnel from their own mental prison cells and instead of daylight they only found themselves emerging in the very spot they were trying to escape.  We are living in the greatest age television has ever known.

    Japanese vinyl gives me all the feels, but in a totally different way that is totally not kosher for me to share with you.  Just look at the beautiful black glitter that makes up Splurrt's Cinema Monster V.  Some people get weepy when they here the national anthem, or witness the birth of a child.  For me, it's great story telling on TV and plastic monsters that gets me all misty.  You can cry tears of joy all over one of these for yourself cause they go on sale this Wednesday, August 12 at 10pm eastern time only from http://www.splurrt.com.  And as a bonus you get a sweet header card done by Johan from Deathcattoys.  Now, since you have a little time to wait before the sale, go watch True Detective.  Or go to work if that's more your thing.  Or whatever, I'm not the boss of you.

"Candy Gore" Custom Show featuring Brandt Peters x Mutant Vinyl Hardcore Opens Tonight at Stranger Factory

    There's sooooooo many custom toy shows out there every week that I can barely keep up with them.  Not that it's a bad thing, it's just I have to go to work eventually and can't begin to tell you about all of them, let alone attend them.  But let me tell you something, I would smack the teeth out of your grandma to be at Stranger Factory tonight when the Candy Gore show opens.  Brandt Peters and Mutant Vinyl Hardcore are bringing the plastic pain for this show and there hasn't been one piece that they've teased that I didn't want to own.  Seriously, there is no toy show that's gonna be better this year and if you're lucky enough to be in attendance you need to know how jealous I am of you.   I am so jealous I would put your mom in the Camel Clutch until she testified in open court that my legal name was the Iron Sheik.

     Now, the show itself doesn't start until 6pm, but if you want to purchase one of the insane pieces on display, and trust me you do, then you need to get your hind parts there at 11am and register for the lottery.  Here's some info of how that is gonna go down:

– You can sign up for the lottery starting Friday, August 7th at 11am when Stranger Factory opens

– You may start viewing the opening of Candy Gore at 6pm August 7th

– Random drawing order to purchase work begins at 6:15pm August, 7th

– When your name is drawn, you may choose 1 piece of work by each artist: Brandt Peters and Mutant Vinyl Hardcore totaling 2 pieces for your turn

– When all names have been drawn, a second round of names drawn will begin allowing 1 piece of work by each artist: Brandt Peters and Mutant Vinyl Hardcore totaling 2 pieces second round

A Rundown of Upcoming Kidrobot Releases

    Sometimes in this life you just need to cuddle something.  Sometimes you need to sit on the couch, watch your DVR'd episodes of Naked and Afraid and just snuggle up to something soft and warm.  Sometimes your cats get sick of you holding onto them like a fuzzy little therapy doll and will bite you repeatedly to get you to stop crying on their fur.  If this sounds like you than you are the perfect candidate to own these plush buggies from the hit game Best Fiends and Kidrobot.  Look at how adorable they are, just waiting for to pick them up and melt away the stress of the day.  As an added bonus their teeth seem to be made of felt, which last time I checked will not cause unwanted blood loss.  Best of all they're available right now for only $5.99 each at www.kidrobot.com.  

    I've really gotta get out and get a hair cut today.  I'm starting to look like a Sears catalog model from the '70's.  No not the underwear dudes, more like the husky section, which truth be told doesn't seem that flattering now that I'm reading it.  Maybe I'll actually run to the Hair Cuttery and sweat out some of this manliness.  

    I'm thinking I could pull of this sick Baby Huey fade.  You gotta admire someone hell bent on destroying our country who looks so ridiculous.  Maybe if he let his people have the internet one of his advisors could tell him that the old high and tight may work for Dolph Lundgren, but not so much on his pumpkin head.  Frank Kozik's depiction of this megalomaniac will be available starting this Friday, August 7th, from your favorite toy retailers.  Available in two different colors and priced at $65 each, you can easily afford to get em both and impose your own UN sanctions.   

    This is what I like to see.  Yes, of course I like to see Dunnys cause they're my jam and whatnot, but I like to see new artists get a shot at making awesome production pieces.  Way back in the past you couldn't have had all the Dunny artists in the same van at once because if something tragic happened that would be the end of the line.  It was a serious issue.  But the new regime at Kidrobot knows that there are talented folks all over this world who can bring it when it comes to designing a toy.  One of these new talents is Wuzone, who killed it with his debut 8 inch figure.  You can pick one up next Friday, August 14th wherever you like to buy your toys.  

"Tales from The Netherknowle" Kickstarter from Taylored Curiosities

    

    Who doesn't love a good adventure?  Most of mine usually end with the line "and that's how we ended up spending our weekend in the emergency room", but that's like a whole separate bonus adventure itself.  Some of the more interesting ones I will tell you about as soon as there is no question whether or not the statute of limitations has passed.  I've seen enough episodes of Scared Straight to know that prison would be the death of me.  Not from a stray shank to the ribs, or from some beast of a man thinking I look like his ex wife, I'm talking about the food.  Have you see what they get fed, cause lunch is pretty much capital punishment.  Your demise may not be as quick as with the electric chair, but you'll be wishing for it the moment your body tries to extract and nutrients from that old bologna sandwich.  That's the kind of adventure I do not need in my life.

    I would, however, be willing to go anywhere with these little dudes.  They're as trustworthy as those beavers from Narnia and I'm sure something magical would happen on your trip.  Maybe you would meet a talking raccoon who wants to chat about the newest season of True Detective, or maybe you would stumble upon a witch's house made of beef wellington.  The possibilities are only limited by your imaginations, which could spell trouble for some of you.  I kid, you know I love you unconditionally.  Or is that conditionally?  Which one is it where you have to do stuff for me or I cut you off?

    Taylored Curiosities wants to send you on an adventure with her newest creations, but in order to start your journey you have to back her Kickstarter campaign.  Check it out here and pack your bags to do some serious exploring.  And watch out for cops cause I will not bail you out.

Cecil The Lion Beanie Baby To Raise Funds for Wildlife Charity

    Yeah, I know, Beanie Babies aren't necessarily tops on my list of things to write about.  But there's nothing that angers me more than people hurting animals so they can feel better about their own short comings (if you get my drift).  The fact that such an act is listed as one of the primary traits of serial killers shouldn't surprise anyone, cause you have to be pretty sick to kill something as beautiful as defenseless.  I've never understood big game hunting, probably because I'm not mentally stunted, and after hearing about Cecil the lion I have been sick down to my very soul.  Sick to think that a fellow human being could do such a thing and even sicker in the pride they feel in it.  So yeah, I'm writing about Beanie Babies today because that's how far my disgust has taken me and it's the only action besides strangling the idiot that killed this magnificent creature that may make me feel slightly better.  

    Next month TY is going to release a special stuffed critter to commemorate Cecil and raise money for WildCRU, which is Oxford University's Wild Conservation Unit and were the folks that were studying the lions in that area.  100% of the proceeds will be donated to them to continue their research into saving the world's endangered species.  At only $5.99, everyone can easily afford to buy one of these and help out a most worthy cause.   

Bella Lee: Noir Edition from Scott Tolleson x Pobber Toys

    Man, I never knew how hard it is to find reasonable people to hire.  I've been trying to help wrangle candidates for my job and it has been no easy task.  To make matters worse, when you find a resume that's worth looking at, sometimes their very name will just ruin it for you.  For instance, how am I supposed to ever be expected to work with someone named Cupcake?  I can't take that seriously, and I refuse to call someone by a name like that, whether their parents actually put that on their birth certificate or not.  And what am I supposed to tell me wife when she asks me about my day?  It's gonna sound like I'm some low-grade pimp with a stable of girls on the corner.

     Bella Lee here had parents that actually thought their daughter could be anything she wanted to be, but even not being named Glitter didn't keep her from a life of questionable employment.  Or she might just be trying to pay down her student loans, in which case I totally understand.  Either way, Scott Tolleson and Pobber are pleased to offer this purrty lady online this Thursday, August 6th, for $120.  This 8 inch resin figure is limited to 50 pieces and only available from www.pobber.com.  

Last Day to Enter the Slugbeard Lottery from Paul Kaiju x Toy Art Galley

    I am getting so old.  Last night Sharon and I went to The Smashing Pumpkins/Marilyn Manson show and I am dragging this morning.  It's the first show we've been to in a long time because frankly, we've seen just about everyone we could ever want to that's still alive,  We used to go to shows all the time so we checked just about everyone of our must-see list.  We've seen both of these bands numerous times, but they are two of our absolute favorites and the show was amazing.  I do have one question though: when did people start watching the shows only through their phones?  Everywhere we looked were people who were just taking pictures and recording snuff film quality footage on their cell phones.  Whats the point of paying to see a band live if you're going to spend the entire time wondering if you got something worthy of uploading to Facebook?  People are weird.  

   All those people could have done something productive with their data plans, like enter the latest Sluggard lottery from Paul Kaiju and Toy Art Gallery.  It ends today at 12pm pacific time and these are the details you need:

Email sales@toyartgallery.com with “Slugbeard Lottery” as the subject along with your paypal address and shipping info. If selected you will be sent an invoice for payment. Please allow 24 hours for a response after the closing time (Monday 12PM PST). Winners will be chosen at random, one entry per participant please (if you submit more than once you will be disqualified). Good luck!

The Brute Low Poly Viking from Jona Dinges x VTSS Toys

    There can never be enough Viking toys out there.  That's not even my opinion, that's pure fact.  So many people in the toy world are inspired by Asian Art, or graphitti, or drug abuse, but Nordic art is sorely under represented.  And it's not like the Vikings weren't creating some beautiful work in between cracking skulls and looting monasteries, it's just people are way more into violence than wood carving.

    Not that this guy was inspired by anything the Vikings created as much as he was their very essence of awesome, but it's still a step closer.  I love this figure drom Jona Dinges x VTSS Toys and if you've got $220 laying around you can love it in person in your own house.  They only made 50 and they should be available today at http://www.vtsstotoys.com.  

What if Mr. T and the TMNT Had a Baby? Dead Greedy Has the Answer For You

    The scenario I described in the title of this post of course would depend on there being female ninja turtles, which is a spin off series I'm shocked no one has done yet.  It would be the perfect plan for Shredder to create chick turtles, thus distracting our heroes long enough to take over the world to the point that there's nothing they could do.  I am really underutilizing my skills as an evil genius.

    My man Dead Greedy is so far ahead of the game though, cause he already had Mr. T swoop in and  woo the green right off of one of those turtle ladies with the promise of gold chains and massive amounts of the pitying of fools.  At this very moment you could snag yourself one of those mini Mr. TMNT in the color of your choice for $20, or get one of each (that's five total) for $75.  Or you could go much bigger, and get a sweet carded version painted up like Michelangelo for $50.  Take a gander at the madness over at http://www.shop.craptasticplastic.com/main.sc. 

Micro Nyagira Custom Series Available Now from Max Toy Co.

    Sharon and I recently took her parents and our niece to a local no-kill animal shelter because they have what is probably the greatest amusement park ride in history.  There's this series of three rooms that house all of the cats that are adoptable and the ones that will live there forever based on various reasons.  The place is wall to wall free roaming cats with a few lawn chairs right smack in the middle.  You go in, you sit down, and you are instantly covered in a mound of kitty snuggles.  I dare Six Flags to come up with anything better.  

    My own house is beyond capacity in the amount of fuzzy friends it already holds, so we have sworn an oath to only welcome plastic kitties in for the time being.  This Micro Niagara custom from Max Toy Company seems to fit that bill quite well.  Hand painted by Mark Nagata in an edition of only 14, there are still a few left over at http://www.maxtoyco.com for $30 each.  

The Christmas Dunny Has Returned Courtesy of Frank Kozik x Kidrobot

    I'm a sucker for a good theme.  Even though the food is usually terrible I love a good themed restaurant and have eaten at Planet Hollywood, The Hard Rock Cafe, and even the WWE joint when that was still a thing in Times Square, just to be able to see the decor.  How can you not love an excessive display of grandeur all made in an attempt to make you eat otherwise unpalatable food?  I had my own idea for a theme restaurant once, but it was all based on the employees.  I wanted everyone that worked there to constantly be involved in dramatic situations throughout their shifts.  One server would pretend to have a nervous breakdown, two more would get into a verbal altercation, maybe another would fake an amputation at the hand of a deli slicer.  I'm nosey and I figure lots of other people are too, and what better way to enjoy a good meal than have a bit craziness thrown in.  For some reason Gordon Ramsey won't return my calls looking for an investment.  

    What was the point of all that again?  Oh yeah, I love themes, and it broke my heart last year when Kidrobot didn't release a Christmas Dunny.  Ok, that might be over selling it, but I do look forward to them every year which is why I was excited to find out that Frank Kozik's little elf buddy you see there will be released in time for the holidays.  myplasticheart broke the news last night on Instagram and is now taking preorders for these, with more stores sure to be following suit.  Now if I can just convince them to release a Dunny for Leif Erikson Day.  

The Minatorg Resin figure from BOObotcher x Forces of Dorkness Available Now!!!!!

    Let's all take a moment to give my boy Theseus some credit.  First and foremost, you wouldn't catch me skulking around a pitch-black labyrinth.  I always think how cool it would be to explore the abandoned place in Philadelphia, but I am way overdue for my tetanus booster.  Secondly, there's the Minotaur to contend with, who is like the ancient version of a crackhead armed with hepatitis needles.   You stumble upon that bro, and it's a trip to the emergency room and blood tests every six months.  So I give much respect for Theseus for being the ultimate explorer/monster killer.  I really should rewrite all of the Greek myths with a more urban so the kids of today could truly appreciate them.  I'm gonna call it "Straight Outta Athens".  

     As if a giant man-bull lurking in the dark wasn't enough to scare the crap out of you, what about one that's gone full Terminator?  The Minatorg from BOObotcher and Forces Of Dorkness could definitely have a place in my book, what with his giant arm cannon thingy and overall menacing look.  This is the first version of this collaborative figure, cast in translucent red resin, standing 4 and 1/2 inches tall and available right now for only $25 bagged with a header card.  Snag this updated nightmare of mythology by visiting http://forcesofdorkness.storenvy.com/

Battle Cat Trophy Sculpture from Pretty in Plastic

    When I was little I used to keep a notebook filled with all the ridiculous things I would buy if I was stupid rich.  Most of the stuff involved was from the JCPenny or Sears Christmas catalogs, but times were hard and no one had the internet in their house yet, so you have to work with what ya got.  And I kept things real specific too, just in case when I got stupid rich my memory wasn't as bangin as my bank account.  All item details were on the left of the page, with the prices on the right.  I also accounted for Virginia sales tax cause I didn't want to come up short on my imaginary spending spree.  Now that I see this I almost wish I was still keeping up with my stupid rich notebook, or at least stupid rich so I could skip the whole recording process and just buy this sucker straight cash.

    Oh may have previously seen this sweet Battle Cat trophy head hanging up in Super7's San Diego location when it was transformed into Skeletor's Lair during San Diego Comic Con.  And if you did then you've probably tried to figure out how to get one for yourself ever since.  Well, Pretty In Plastic are making 10 of these beauties available and the price tag is certainly not for the faint of heart, but beyond worth it.  At $8500 each it may not fit into every budget, but just think about how jealous everyone will be when they know you have it.  How can you put a price on that kind of envy?  If you want one shoot an email over to admin@prettyinplastic.com.

    On a different note: stop hunting real animals for sport.  It doesn't make you a man to shoot a defenseless creature.  In fact, it makes you a coward.  I have no problem with people hunting to eat, but there is no reason to do so because you think its fun.  It makes me want to hurt you.

More WWE Goodness Coming from Funko

    Oh you all know I looooooooove my wrasslin.  I haven't been to an event since Sharon and I went to the Royal Rumble in January, but that wrasslin-less streak is about to be broken in a big way cause we got tickets to Summerslam!!!!!  I was already beyond psyched when they announced The Undertaker was gonna fight Brock Lesnar, but just yesterday I discovered that it's going to be a FOUR HOUR pauper view.  Usually they're all three hours except for Wrestlemania, but now we're getting an extra hour of brutality!!!!   And now that I think about it, this is probably the only thing that could last for that long that I'd ever be excited about.  Usually when I'm at work and I see there's four more hours before I can leave it takes all my will power not to shove a screw driver into my heart and swirl it around.  But if you're talking about some serious sports entertainment, I'm there the whole day.

    Do you have enough WWE Superstar Pop! Vinyls in your collection yet?  Probably not, jabroni, but Funko's gonna help you out with new ones featuring Sting, Andre the Giant, and The Bella Twins.  All of these should be available in September.

    

    And they've got these little blind boxed dudes coming out too, which I'm sure will be delayed now as they're gonna have to not only redo the packaging but pay someone to open em all and remove a certain someone who is going through a bit of controversy right now.  But enough about that, let's focus on how badly I want a little Iron Sheik figure!!!!!!!!!  Even if you're not a wrestling fan, you need to follow the Iron Sheik on every form of social media you have, cause that dude is the best thing to happen to the internet since the domestication of cats.  

Junko Mizuno's "Violet Soda Lady" from Kidrobot Releasing This Week

    I've made no effort whatsoever to hide my love for this toy.  I loved the 3 inch version and I'm beyond smitten with Junko Mizuno's first foray into the 8 inch Dunny realm.  After taunting us with teaser images, box art, and a variant companion piece at San Diego Comic Con, Kidrobot is finally ready to bless us with this figure.

    This Friday, July 31st you'll be able to get your mitts on this beauty, courtesy of your favorite toy retailer.  I haven't bought a toy with a price tag like this in almost a year, and waited till two days ago to preorder and ensure I would get one.  I'm not the best at spending money, but I just had to have it.  I suggest you put one for yourself on lockdown by hunting for anyone with a preorder left.  Or get yourself up nice and early on Friday and check out the Kidrobot website when they put their supply up at 9am MST. Or if you're lucky to live close to San Francisco, you can visit the Kidrobot store from 6pm-9pm and have the artist sign the toy for you.  So many options!!!!!!!!!!

"Man in Red" Francios le Grande Preorder from Lullubell Toys

    

    There's something about giant figures that just captivates me.  Any time I go into a store and see a cool display made of plastic or fiberglass I always want to take it home.  The other day on the Ocean City boardwalk a store had a huge hermit crab hanging from the ceiling and I wanted that thing sooooooooooooo badly.  I have no idea what I would have done with it when I got it home, but that was the least of the problems as I saw it.  I just wanted it and didn't care about anything else.  One of these days if I ever have stupid money, I'm gonna buy up a ton of stuff like that and just fill the basement with them.  My goal has been to have the house look like an art gallery/medical museum/prop rental company, so God help me if I ever win the lottery.  Sharon and I are already doing a pretty god job with limited resources, so we might go full Addam's Family with a little bit of cash.   

    The point of it all, if I am going to try and focus here, is that this Francois Le Grande figure from Lulubell Toys is massive.  He's almost 16 inches tall and this is the first ever version featuring a full paint job.  he is available to preorder right now over at http://www.lulubelltoys.com for $185.  The preorder window closes tomorrow night at 5pm pacific time.  

New Figures from doubleparlour Available Today!!!!!!!

    You probably didn't know until this very moment that you needed an axe-wielding, skinned and pantsless military officer in your life.  Or you might have always known that, in which case I hope you have good health insurance cause you're gonna need to talk to someone about that.  Just kidding silly, you were probably just checking out doubleparlour's Instagram feed for news about their latest creations, which coincidentally happen to be coming out today.  You have the above mentioned dude, as well as this little scooter riding chap you see below.  The sale starts at noon pacific time over at http://doubleparlour.myshopify.com and probably won't last long, so cancel all your meeting, have someone hold all your calls, and buy yourself something nice.

Smorkin' Monger Jerome from Frank Kozik x Rotofugi x Squibbles Ink Available Now

    Me and ice cream aren't friends.  We used to be back in the day, but then something happened between ice cream and my digestive system and they have been enemies every since.  It's probably been 20 years or more since that cool, refreshing dairy treat has passed my lips, but I still remember it well.  If I try hard I can almost taste the sweet vanilla goodness of a soft serve cone, but then my stomach seems to get wind of my mental betrayal and starts rumbling in protest.  If the US and Cuba can put aside their differences you would think a bit of diplomacy would go a long way in healing this rift in my body, but I seem to be doomed to a life where ice cream is but a distant, delicious, memory.

    Frank Kozik debuted this giant sized Smorkin' Monger named Jerome at San Diego Comic Con, but now he is available to all of us unable to attend.  Produced by Rotofugi and Squibbles Ink, this 4 inch figure retails for only $15.95 and is available right this second at www.rotofugi.com 

New Plaseebo x Gorgoloid Collaborations Dropping Tomorrow

    I hope you weren't looking for a good night's sleep later, cause this is straight up nightmare fuel.  I love the work of Plaseebo, because everything he makes looks like it's ready to kill you and live off of what's left.  I've determined that is my favorite genre of toy, right up there with "so cute I could vomit glitter" and "looks like a murder weapon from True Detective."  My tastes are very specific.  

   Plaseebo has teamed up once again with Gorgoloid for three special Night Gamers that will be available tomorrow, Friday the 24th, over at www.plaseebo.net.  If I bought one I would probably lock it in a safe when I went to sleep, you know, just in case.  

Lemon and Lime Robo Tops from Inami Toyland Available Tonight!

     You know the best way to make friends besides having lots of money and paying them off?  You gotta go out there and meet folks.  For some people that's pretty easy to do; you just go out there, strike up a conversation, and become bestie for life.  For others though, once that good conversation dries up like the Sahara you gotta have ways to keep things fresh and interesting.  What better way to do that than some good ol fashioned competition!  

    Robo Tops from Inami Toyland are the perfect thing to bond you for life.  Not only do they cure boredom by being the most inventive version of rock paper scissors you've ever seen, they could also lead to fist fights if one person is way better at it than the other.  One of my best friends from high school only became that after we beat the crap out of each other. True story.

    These lemon and lime versions will be available tonight at 9pm over at www.InamiToyland.com.  Theres only 10 of each color and they will be $15 each.  

Target Exclusive Ric Flair Pop! Vinyl from Funko

    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!  I don't talk too much about Pop! Vinyls, cause honestly the dang things are everywhere.  I renewed my car insurance it came with an exclusive figure.  I find the things stuffed behind my books, a handful fell out of a new bag of cat litter, and I think I may have my own likeness available any day now.  At one time I as trying to collect all the different versions of Batman, but some of those suckers are priced so outrageously on the secondary market that I abandoned that quest for the sake of my own mental health.  But then this.  Let's go to the video, Tony Shiavone:

 

    I don't think that really had anything to do with toys, but I can't stop listening to The Nature Boy tell you what's what.  And if you buy this Target exclusive figure he can inspire you to cut the most over the top, energetic promos on everyone in your life.   Whether it's your boss, the pope, or anyone else giving you a heap of sass, you put your aviators on, sling your title belt over you shoulder, and let them know that if they wanna be the man, they gotta beat the man.  You should probably do a few push ups too just in case they try and call you on that last part.

    I have no idea when these are coming out and no one else in the world seems to either, so just keep harassing you local Target until victory is yours.

Shipwrecked Plunder Boys: Harr Hanchor Limited Edition from Goodleg Toys Available Now!!!!

    I can't tell if these dudes are ready to star in a crazy horror film or one of those late night movies that you can find on Cinemax (not that I can even stay up that late anymore, but I've heard stories).  Either way, it seems like massive amounts of booty is about to be plundered whenever Harr Hanchor is around.  Imagine how much more interesting Deadliest Catch would be if someone that looked like this was running one of those crab boats.  That show was cool at first but now its either "we found some crabs" or "we ain't got no crabs" or someone falls overboard succumbing to the cruel mistress that is the sea.  Throw this guy in the mix and now you've got yourself something worth watching.  This Bubble Gum edition of figures is available right now from the only guys who could come up with something this nuts, Goodleg Toys. Start building up your pirate crew at http://goodlegtoys.storenvy.com