Prey For Me by Godmachine x Disturbia

    I get tired of cutesy things.  Sure, my house is filled with little plastic creations that fall into that category, but sometimes you need something a bit darker.  Something that will make people wonder what you have going on in your basement.   

    Godmachine and Disturbia have just the thing.  Just look at it.  It's magnificent.  It looks like it was pulled from the bowels of Hell and is ready to be put on your shelf so your cats can rub their faces all over it.  Or put it on your desk at work so everyone stops stealing your favorite pen (I know who you are).  This sucker is 8 inches tall and comes in black, bronze, and white.  They made 100 of the black and just 50 of the other two, making this evil little monk pretty limited.  You can open your house up to the dark side on June 18th when they are available to preorder through http://www.disturbia.co.uk/. 

New Releases Tomorrow from Frank Kozik

    When I was a wee little viking lad I had a love of prank calls.  I would dial random numbers in the phone book and make up the most elaborate stories I could just to see how long I could keep people on the line.  I was kind of a jerk.  Once, there was this kid that irritated me, so a friend of mine and I called up his dad to let him know that the Playboy subscription his son had ordered with his credit card was about to expire and would he like to renew.  Hilarity ensued.  But this was long before caller ID and being scared to death when someone read you back your phone number in a "GOTCHA" tone of voice.  My mom tried to tell me that operators listened in on all of your phone calls and if you said anything bad they would send the police to your house and you would be in huge trouble.  Who knew that she had the gift of prophecy and that it would actually come true one day?  She was well ahead of her time.  

    Mr. Halliburton  isn't listening in on the other line, but he would be happy to use that information against you.  I for one have never trusted business squids, but I am a natural born skeptic.  Frank Kozik has made 30 of these guys to deploy all over the world to act as your own personal Dick Cheney.  Just don't take him hunting.  $85 will get you one with a signed and numbered header card.

    Why not also pick up some new artwork so your house looks better when it's featured on Hoarders?  Plus, when the regime change happens you don't want to not be displaying the logo of our new (improved?) governmental body.  Sixty people will be able to pledge their allegiance for the low price of $50.  It beats being sent to Guantanamo.  Get both of these tomorrow (June 12th) at noon Pacific time at www.frankkozik.net.

End Transmission

UglyDolls x Sanrio Collaboration

    Sometimes you just need a little something to brighten your day. Sometimes that thing is an adorable cat wearing the carcass of something else almost as adorable. I'm just kidding, the UglyDolls that's Hello Kitty is wearing are obviously costumes. (Hello Kitty may make me disappear if I she feels I have offended her. She rolls like the mafia). This match made in cuddly heaven will feature these plushes as well as tons of other merch that is set to debut at San Diego Comic Con.

Mouseketeer Army from Bob Dob x 3D Retro for SDCC

    This is Wil. Wil is not messing around. They don't sell this Micky Mouse ears with pieces missing from them, and you add in his baseball bat and combat boots and you've got one serious bro. Wil and the rest of the Mouseketeer Army have taken it upon themselves to defend Disneyland from some group called the Yippies, who aren't fans of the happiest place on Earth. You can get this first figure in the series from 3D Retro's booth at San Diego Comic Con for $70. Only 250 were made.

Six Eyed Ghouls and Doku Head DX from Blobpus x Mutant Vinyl Hardcore

    Normally these guys are almost impossible to get.  You'd have to enter your name in a lottery and hope you win the chance to purchase one.  But today is your lucky day because you can be the proud owner of one of these Mutant Vinyl Hardcore figures custom painted by Blobpus without the fuss of a random drawing.  Imagine how impressed your friends will be that you were able to get one.  Unless your friends are like mine and can't wrap their heads around why I would spend all of my money on toys in the first place, in which case you will just have to impress yourself.  Blobpus has opened the ordering window for these two guys until June 14th.  That is unless he gets way too many orders and has to pull the plug early.  But so far they are still available at his website http://blobpus.jp/store/index.html.

SDCC Exclusive Video Game Jason Voorhees from NECA

    I was so jealous when my neighbor got the Friday the 13th video game for the original Nintendo.  He was a smug little punk, but i wanted to play it so bad because I loved the movies as a kid, so I graciously invited myself over to play it.  My jealousy quickly turned to embarrassment for him, because that gamed sucked so bad.  No matter where you went or what you did, Jason was bound to kill you.  So in a lot of ways it stayed true to the films, but it was frustrating beyond belief.  You enter a cabin: JASON.  You walk along the lake: JASON.  And why was he purple?  Was he going through a weird phase like those little kids you see at the mall wearing a Spider Man costume?  

    This figure from NECA has to be the only good thing that has ever resulted from this horrible game's existence.  This purple, glow in the dark Jason is an exclusive to San Diego Comic Con and without a doubt the highlight of the show.  They even packaged it in a replica of the original game box, complete with some of the awful graphics.  It's so campy that it is a definite win on every front.  Buy one for yourself at booth # 3145 or beg anyone you know that's going to get you one.  

Semi Korosiya Black from Cop A Squat Toys

    I have a love/hate relationship with unpainted toys.  The purist in me wants to keep them as they were intended, just plain with no color other than that of the plastic.  Another part of me wants to take them into my basement, fire up the old airbrush, and assault them with crazy colors.  That part of me is also scared to death that he's going to ruin an expensive toy and be really pissed about it.

    So I normally avoid the conflict in my brain by not buying blank figures.  Then something like this pops up and I forget what little sense of reason I've had bestowed upon me.  Cop A Squat Toys is releasing this all black Semi Korosiya today (June 7th) at 3pm Eastern time.  This sucker is 8 inches tall and looks like he just dropped from the sky ready to enslave mankind.  $65 will get you one from http://www.copasquattoys.com/.

Maple Man Mini Marshall from 64 Colors x Squibbles Ink x Rotofugi

    When my wife and I went to Montreal a few years back one of the places we wanted to hit up was Tim Hortons.  Ok, maybe that's a little lame, but we're huge hockey fans and we don't have them where we live so it was kinda exciting for us.  The first (and last) donuts we tried were these maple iced donuts.  Holy mother of God those were the most amazing donuts we've ever eaten in our lives!  We ate them every morning for breakfast and would get one every time we passed a Tim Hortons, which is like passing a hooker in Atlantic City at 3am.  We counted up the empty boxes and bags at the end of our stay, and we determined that we each ate a dozen of them in a week.  The whole time it was a blur of maple flavored goodness and I am just thankful that we are not diabetic as a result.

    So to wrap this up, I have a special love for all things maple, that's why this new Mini Marshall from 64 Colors x Squibbles Ink x Rotofugi really speaks to me.  They made 200 of these guys to coincide with the opening of their Maple City art show tonight in Chicago and attendees will have the first crack at these figures.  Any left overs will then be put up on www.rotofugi.com this Monday, June 10th.  Each one was hand printed and distressed and will sell for $14.95.  That would buy quite a few donuts.

Two More Summer Exclusives from Mezco

    You know what drives me insane?  Well, a lot of things do, but this time of year what really makes me want to jump off the roof (and I'm scared of heights, so this is a big deal)?  All the cool stuff that releases at San Diego Comic Con that I can't buy.  I mean, I could buy it, because people usually post things on eBay while they're still waiting in line for them.  But I'm not a rich man.  I can't pay those kind of prices.  So I just stay mad for a few months, try to wait for the hype to die down, and then still pay way to much for them.  Mezco knows how it is.  Sure, if you're going to SDCC you could buy these figures, but if you're not then just preorder these suckers right now and have em delivered to you like a pizza.  Brilliant!

  

    You could get this Walter White figure from Breaking Bad right this instant.  He's sporting a pretty nifty hazmat suit and comes with some essential meth making accessories.  Just remember kids, even the best hazmat suit won't save you when your trailer park lab blows sky high, so be careful with those chemicals.  Nothing cramps a thriving drug business like your production facility burning up with the fire of Hades.  

    Or you could order this Cheetarah and Snarf 2 pack from the Thundercats.  It is a well established fact that no one in the cartoon world wears a leotard the way Cheetarah does.  That kinda sounded creepy now that I'm thinking about it.  Such is life.  

    Both of these are available for preorder right now at http://www.mezcotoyz.com/.

A Clockwork Carrot Signing with Frank Kozik at Toy Art Gallery

    Frank Kozik is going to be at Toy Art Gallery in Los Angeles this Saturday night to sign his A Clockwork Carrot figures.  He's also going to be releasing the new, all white, "Pure Evil" version of this massive figure that is a shared exclusive between TAG and Blackbook Toy.  That's it.  That's literally all I have.  I tried to think of something funny or clever to say but for some reason my brain isn't functioning at full capacity today.  I wanted to concoct a way to have everyone that attends bring him fried pies like Hostess used to make because I remember him posting on Facebook that he liked them and it would be funny if every picture of the event involved a huge pile of snack food that he was brought as some quasi-offering.  Like, if he was the toughest guy on your cell block and the only way he would protect your hind parts from the leering eye of Bubba was if once a week you cleaned the commissary out of their fried fruit pies.  I know I have a lot of readers in the greater Los Angeles area, so buy the man some pies and then buy yourself a toy and have him scrawl his name somewhere on it.  You'll be a better person for it.  

Sideways from Yoskay Yamamoto x Mighty Jaxx

    I'm no stranger to having a large melon.  Not that it's ever prevented me from wearing hats or fitting through door ways, but I have a lot of skull.  Nowhere near this guy I used to know though, as his head was the biggest I've ever seen.  And he wasn't that smart either, so he wasn't storing a wealth of knowledge in that thing.  I think he may have been renting it out to a family of squirrels.  But even he could stand upright.  

    Not so much with this guy from Yoskay Yamamoto x Mighty Jaxx.  His head is so massive that he is powerless to lift it from the floor.  Only 200 of these were made comprised of a wood head and a resin body.  They will be available for preorder this Thursday, June 6th, from http://mightyjaxx.com/.

    On a side note, I really enjoy the way Mighty Jaxx mixes up their releases.  You never know what to expect from them and they are really the only toy company I can think of that is completely unpredictable.  Kudos to them for making what they love and not catering to what they think people want to see.  

New Releases This Thursday from The Mark Ultra

    These guys look like they control all of the taco sauce drilling efforts in Mexico.  You didn't know that that's how they got taco sauce?  It's just like drilling for oil except when there's a spill you just pass out tortilla chips and it's a party.  This guy is called Senor Cybernetico and he was made by The Mark Ultra and Alexis Ziritt.  And while they may or may not use scare tactics to control their interests in taco sauce, they will be on sale starting Thursday, June 6th.  They will be $20 each and the red and gold one will be for sale at http://themarkultra.bigcartel.com/, while the black and silver will be for sale at Alexis's booth at Heroes Con this Friday.

    The Mark Ultra also teamed up with Green Plastic Tunnels to create some one-off lucky bags for release this Thursday as well.  For $22 you could get any one of the hand made figures you see below.  These will also be available at http://themarkultra.bigcartel.com/.  

Minicel DIY at SDCC from Kuso Vinyl

    If I had the ability to draw I'd be dangerous!  I have no idea exactly why I would be dangerous, and actually I'd probably be just as mopey as I am now.  But I'm sure I could be dangerous if I wanted to.  I would draw all over toys and sell them for lots of money on the internet and then use that money to buy an alpaca farm.  Those glorified llamas are ridiculously expensive.

     If I could draw I would need lots of toys to draw on, and this would be a cool one to start with.  Kuso Vinyl is adding to the DIY pool of blank figures with this Minicel.  And he comes with an arsenal.  He's begging for you to turn him into a killing machine.  This guy wil be released at San Diego Comic Con for only $10 at the Kuso Vinyl booth #5642. I'm sure you'll be able to buy him afterwards too, so don't try and get one on eBay and feel dumb when you pay too much for it.  

Pop! Vinyl Exclusives from Gemini Collectibles and Funko

    If you've watched the new season of Arrested Development, you will have a new appreciation for this figure.  Don't worry, I'm not going to ruin it for any of you that for one reason or another have failed to watch it.  I have enough friends that consistently ruin shows for me on Facebook that I would never consider doing that to you.

    Funko and Gemini Collectibles are offering up this black and white version of everyone's favorite rock man from the Fantastic Four.  Preorders have started now and you can get in on it by visiting http://www.geminicollectibles.net/.  You can also preorder the bronze patina version of The Rocketeer.  Both figures are $16.99 and will be arriving in July.

Jouwe Shark from Mytummytoys

    We all have dreams.  Sometimes they come true, sometimes they don't and they drive us to alcoholism and hefty child support payments.  Jouwe was tired of being just a rhino, so he decided he wanted to be a shark.  A very well fed shark by the looks of it.  So Marine Ramdhani x Mytummytoys helped him realize his dream and behold the results!  Now you can invite him into your home to continue his journey in his new life.  They're taking preorders on this dude now and everything you need to know is in the flyer.  

Watchmen Pop! Vinyl from Funko

    I would like to thank the good people at Funko for covering Dr. Manhattan's ding a ling for this toy.  I'm not sure what possessed the people that made The Watchmen movie to include that in the film.  Where they planning to make a spin-off?  Like when Joey moved to California after Friends ended to pursue his acting career?  I'm embarrassed I know that.

    Do I write a lot about Pop! Vinyl figures?  Yes, but maybe other companies should step up their games and be as prolific as Funko is.  Of course it's not just about releasing a lot of stuff, it's about releasing quality stuff that people want to buy.  Well, they've kinda nailed that too, because I'm going to be getting both of these.  And I don't have to worry about not eating lunch all week to pay for them, cause they're usually around $10.  These two will be released June 20th.  

Living Dead Dolls Resurrection Series 7 from Mezco

 

    These would be a great way to punish kids.  Whenever they act up just lock them in a room full of Living Dead Dolls to modify their behavior.  Unless you have some little weirdo kids like I was, in which case they won't really see it as punishment.  I used to work at a store in the mall that I won't mention because I'm still embarrassed about it (people still ask how I was able to deal with it, though I think that's a better question for my therapist).  We had a little girl who shopped there who couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 and she carried one of these blood-soaked dolls around like a teddy bear.  I always wondered if she had tea parties and all of her guests were corpses.  She was a funny kid and will no doubt grow up to have an interesting profession involving dead people.

    Mezco is releasing the 7th series of Resurrection dolls this July.  This is where they take older designs and revamp them.  They even take the revamped versions and rerevamp them as variants.  You can buy the whole set of 4 for $225 or the set of 4 variants for $250.  You can order these undead kids from http://www.mezcotoyz.com/.

Aloha Diggler from Splurrt x D-Lux

    Check out this bro in his bright summer colors.  And he glows in the dark like a kid from Chernobyl?  Sold.  I love the toys Splurrt makes, and while I wouldn't normally be into these bright colors, they really do work for this figure.  D-Lux did the custom paint on these and you can pick one up from jis webstore tomorrow (June 1) at 3pm Eastern time.  You better bookmark http://dlux.bigcartel.com/ if you hope to score one.  These guys will sell quickly and if you don't get one you will be thrown into a deep depression made all the darker because you don't have this toy to glow like a beacon of hope.  This is how you die.

Weirdos In Space: Wave 1 featuring Rampage Toys and Blurble

    Does a title ever get more descriptive?  There is no ambiguity about what you're going to get here.  You're going to get some freaky looking dudes that some how found their way into the final frontier.  It's a drastic difference from when you buy one of those tv dinners and it looks so delicious on the box, yet when you heat it up in looks like a possum got sick on a plate.  Disappointment and diarrhea every time.  

    These space travelers are the work of Rampage Toys and Blurble, while their alien craft was made by Tru:Tek.  Ten of each design were made in random colors and they will be $24 each.  You can pick one up when they go on sale today (May 31) at 9pm London time at http://manetoys.bigcartel.com/.

Rock 'n' Roll Uamou at Toy Art Gallery

    I would gladly trade all of the casinos near my house for a ton of folks that were into toys and a place like Toy Art Gallery to put them on display.  You can have all the elderly women in their sequined sweaters that guard rows of slot machines like a pit bull in a junk yard while they chain smoke and gamble away inheritances.  You can have the barrage of prostitutes and drug dealers that peddle their wares with a tenacity of a used car salesman.  You can't have the Ripleys Believe It or Not Museum though, that place is worth keeping.  But you can take the bootleg t-shirt shops and the guys whose hair gel weighs more than all of the books in their house.  Let me know when you're ready to deal.

    I am envious of anyone who is lucky enough to live near Toy Art Gallery, and I remind you of that every time I write about them.  Tomorrow they will be opening their new show, Rock 'n" Roll Uamou with special guests RealxHead and Skull Toys.  I love those Nirvana inspired toys pictured below featuring a body clad in the best thrift store fashion and a face with that iconic smiley face logo.  I really started to get into music in the '90's, so the grunge era will always hold a special place in my heart.  They always post the remaining pieces from their shows in the days following the opening, so maybe I'll get a chance to snag one.  Keep the dream of the '90's alive!

Terror Boys Ooze from Brandt Peters x Ferg

    This is the guy that will show up when you try and park your 1970's van at an abandoned camp ground to get fresh with your girlfriend.  I'm just trying to save lives here people, because no one ever learns anything from all of the horror movies out there.  At best anyone wearing a bag over their head might just have one of those weird tumors with a tooth growing out of it and a lack of health insurance to get it dealt with.  Add in the machete and sawed off shotgun, and you know they aren't from AAA looking to help you fix a flat tire.  

    It's not ever day that I'm really impressed by a toy, but this one has managed to leave me in awe.  I love everything about it, but especially his melty face and droopy eye.  It's grotesque while still retaining a sense of innocence about it, like you could almost feel sorry for the guy and the obvious problems he's had with women.  I mean, he is running out of space in his freezer for them, which is a huge problem because he can't just go to Sears and buy another one and I've never heard of a killer with good credit, so even ordering one from the internet is out of the question.  

    You can purchase on of these dudes that Brandt Peters and Ferg made this Monday, June 3rd, at noon Central time for $105 (and that includes shipping anywhere in the world).  Only 225 were made and you can get one at http://store.projectsquadt.com/. 

New Walking Dead Pop! Vinyl from Funko

    I'm about to admit something that will probably make a lot of you mad and may even get me deported.  I don't like The Walking Dead.  There,  I've said it to all 6 of you.  The benefit of admitting such a thing on the internet is that I can go about the rest of my day without having to be looked at as if I just admitted to kicking a puppy.  I also don't have to answer questions like "but what's wrong with you?" or "do you have a vitamin deficiency?"   Here are my problems with the show.  For one, I could care less about zombies.  You want to know when the zombie apocalypse is coming?  If you've ever seen anyone who thinks they have "swag" or have ever used the term "yolo" while clearly not being ironic, then you would know it's already here.  And the second reason I don't like it is because everybody is essentially the exact same person.  What makes a scenario like this interesting is the diversity of the characters.  The people of their group come from all walks of life, but over time they have all morphed into people who are just trying to survive and have lost a lot of what makes them unique.  It was far more interesting when they would have moral issues with killing the zombies, or when they would still question what was going on in the first place.  Now its just accepted as normality.

    The lone bright spot of The Walking Dead for me are the product tie ins.  They're are some clever ones out there, but I think the Pop! Vinyl toys from Funko are the best.  Why?  Because you could make anything as a Pop! Vinyl figure and it automatically becomes cool.  They could make a Charles Manson one and it would be adorable.   Even if it's something I'm not into, I come close to buying one of these whenever I see them.  These will be released July 11th.  And I still love you even if you like The Walking Dead.  But just as friends though.  Stop trying to kiss me.  

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GI Joe Custom Show from The Loyal Subjects x Tenacious Toys x Suburban Vinyl

    We all know the GI Joe movies were garbage.  It's not debatable, as the top scientists across the globe have confirmed it to be true.  Delaying the second one a year to redo it didn't even help.  The Loyal Subjects helped remove some of the tarnish by releasing a cool blind boxed series of vinyl figures that people went nuts over, and now you can see those reinterpreted by some of the best toy customizers out there.  Tenacious Toys teamed up with Suburban Vinyl to put together this custom show that will be happening this Friday, May 31st.  All the details you need are in the pictures, so you have no excuse not to go.  Unless you live, like, really far away or have surgery scheduled for that time.  Then its ok.