Thursday, March 26, 2015

New YinYang Tuttz and More from Argonaut Resins Available Tonight




    This pretty much sums up the dual personalities of cats pretty well.  On the one hand they're all sweet and cuddly and want nothing more than your affection.  On the other hand they are devious little psychopaths who want nothing more than to climb your new curtains like they were training for Wrestlemania.  And you never know from one minute to the next which version you're going to get.  Unless they're napping, then you can bring your expensive stuff back out of hiding with minimal fear that it will end up stolen and under the bed where they know you can't get them back.  Our littlest one is especially devious, as she sits on her hoard like Smaug on Dwarf gold.  

    Argonaut Resins is loading up his web store tonight with a bunch of new stuff playing off of the  theme of duality.  There will be 10 of these stunning black and white 8 inch Tuttz cats available.  Each one is $165 shipped and will come with a matching Tuttz magnet, a set of stickers, and a sketch card.  


    Also releasing tonight will be a one-off Kings of Atlantis Skull made to mimic the kitty. This guy will be available for $175.  


    Everything goes live tonight at 9pm eastern time only at http://argonautresins.bigcartel.com/.  

    

    

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Mint Green Lurkfoot from Lurk x Toy Art Gallery



    I'm gonna have to start billing Toy Art Gallery for the amount of time I dedicate to them.  It's amazing how much they have going on, between their insane art shows and the amount of product they release that Gino and company have easily become one of the most active entities in designer toys.  Without further ado, let's get to it (and the bill's in the mail).

    Did you know that if a domestic pig gets loose and lives in the woods that in 6 months time it will grow tusks, get really hairy, and become completely wild?  Supposedly that's why they find those giant hogzillas in the southern United States, doing whatever hogzillas do.  I think that's what all Bigfoot sightings are; just a random hillbilly a that couldn't find their way home and went feral.  I'll be happy to appear on one of those Discovery Channel shows and explain my theory.

    This 9 inch tall Lurkfoot from Lurk will be available today starting at noon pacific time.  It's made out of mint green vinyl that probably is not flavored like after diner mints, so don't lick it.  Or do lick it, have the weird plastic chemicals go to your brain, and become a feral hillbilly and get your own reality show!


    

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

The Gulf OBP from Huck Gee




  When I first moved to New Jersey I lived with my family right outside of Philadelphia.  That city made me dream big, and I was gonna do big things, but first I needed to get a job.  I started out with high expectations, maybe a little too high, and then kept lowering them day by day until I finally landed a gig selling home security systems.

 Door to door.

In some of the worst neighborhoods of the city.

   A van dropped me and a few other guys off on a corner early every morning and picked us up for lunch, then found another destitute are for us to try out until it was time to call it a day.  Dressed in khaki pants and polo shirts, we were often mistaken for cops.  So much so that I began carrying around one of the yard signs for the company I worked for just so no one thought I was there trying to investigate them.  It stopped me from getting called a narc, but it also had added benefit.  Once when someone wasn't interested In buying a full security system they asked if they could just buy the sign.  Cha-ching I had started my own little side business within the business that I couldn't make a penny off of in the usual way.  For twenty bucks you could have a sign, place that sucker in your window, and put just enough doubt in the mind of a burglar that they rob your idiot neighbors instead of you.

    I probably could have sold what I was actually supposed to if they has included something like this.  Imagine it: a little robot dude patrolling your domicile 24/7 and thwarting the efforts of hooligans at every turn with it's on-board defense system.  Now before you go bombarding me with nonsense about how a robot that's armed to the teeth is not necessarily the safest thing in the world, I've already thought about that.  That's why he'll be armed to the teeth with non-lethal ammo, like bean bags and whatever that stuff Spider-Man shoots from his wrist.

   I don't have the ability to make that a real thing, cause I'm just an idea man.  But Huck Gee has done the hard work of making it look cool, and that's really the first step to full fledged functionality.  The future of home security can be yours for a 24 hour window of time starting this Thursday, March 26th at noon pacific time.  They ain't cheap, but they're all handmade and they will elevate your home to a level of awesomeness you were previously unable to achieve.  Non-lethal awesomeness.





Friday, March 20, 2015

"Full Resin Vinyl" featuring Mutant Vinyl Hardcore x Retroband at Toy Art Gallery




    Some combinations are awesome, like chocolate and peanut butter, or fedoras and creepy dudes.  On paper Mutant Vinyl Hardcore and Retroband don't seem like a pairing you would make for an art show.  One makes crazy Japanese vinyl toys, while the other one makes carded action figures that we all wished we had as kids.  They're seemingly polar opposites, but that's exactly why it's gonna be cool cause there's going to be something for every collector to be amazed by.  Whether your favorite medium is resin, vinyl, or even enormous fiberglass figures, your mind is gonna freak out.  The whole thing happens at Toy Art Gallery tomorrow night starting at 7pm.



Exclusive Green Inner Child from Nerviwr3k x Suburban Vinyl



    Sometimes you shouldn't let your inner child out.  Job interviews come to mind, as do psychiatric evaluations, and parole hearings.  Applying for a gun permit is another, cause they kind of want to make sure you're not a nut.  But just about any other time is completely acceptable so I say go for it, especially if you'll get a good story out of it later.  Just remember that no matter how young you feel inside, you're going to be tried as an adult for jumping into the penguin enclosure at the aquarium.

    The time is nigh to obtain the third colorway of Nerviswr3k's Inner Child figure.  This sucker is clad in Suburban Vinyl green and he will be available exclusively from them tomorrow beginning at noon eastern time in store and online.  Three lucky purchasers will also win an original custom toy from the man himself by finding a special sticker in their box!


Thursday, March 19, 2015

Skinner Unleashes a New Batch of Morgogg and Ogos


   

    There's a lot of stuff Tolkien never covered when he wrote about Middle Earth.  We may never know just how intricate their sanitation systems were.  And you can't tell me all that was going on was some eternal struggle between good and evil cause I ain't buying it.  You can't consume your life with finding a ring, or trashing a ring, or bad mouthing Dwarves.  You gotta have some entertainment thrown in there to break up the day and stop you from going crazy.  For some reason ol J.R.R never mentioned the quite popular spectator sport of Orc wrestling, but lucky for you, I know all about it.

    We're not talking about that lame sport that passes for wrestling in high school or the Olympics, with two dudes rolling around on the floor in a passionate embrace.  No, we're talking about full blown sports entertainment, complete with chairs, title belts, and pudgy troll commentators.  Orcs are pretty hard to tell apart (the Elves said it, not me) so you didn't always know if your guy was winning or not, but it didn't matter.  All that matters was that you enjoyed a good night out with the family, ate some hot dogs, and came home with overly priced souvenir cups.  And if someone died.  It was much more of a blood sport than the WWE we know of today.

   Morgogg and Ogos look like they could be the undisputed tag team champions of Orc wrestling.  And no need for them to dig around under the ring looking for something illegal to use, as they come right out with some gnarly looking clubs and bad attitudes to match.  Skinner is set to drop these both in his online store tomorrow, March 20th, at noon pacific time.  There will be 10 of each figure and they will each come with an exclusive 8 x 10 giclee print.  The first person to order each figure will also get a blank black one for free!!!  It's like, too much for me to process right now.







   


"Green Slime" Sofubi Alien from Super7 x Secret Base




    I have yet to learn my lesson about staying off of social media during holidays.  A few days ago was St.Patrick's Day and Facebook was flooded with either pictures of leprechauns or people drinking.  Essentially, it was boring.  The only thing good that can come of it will be when everyone posts all the stupid stuff they did while extremely intoxicated.  Hopefully I'll get to read a good story or two, whether they admit to it themselves or I see it in the news.

    The only redeeming part of St. Patrick's Day for me is that everything is green, which just so happens to be my favorite color.  Not that you would necessarily know that by looking at what I wear or the stuff I own, but it was always a favorite when I was a kid so I'm sticking with it.  Which Is why I'm going to go a head and declare this "Green Slime" Alien figure the best one yet.  I don't know how Super7 and Secret Base are gonna top this see through green vinyl figure accented by a very nice black paint rub, but that doesn't mean they won't try.  These beauties go on sale Friday,  March 20th at noon pacific time from www.super7store.com.  

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

A Plethora of Alavaka Goods from Scarecrowoven x Devils Head Productions




    It's hard to buy an album these days.  Not physically of course, unless you're trying to go to an actual record store in which the difficulty there would be finding one.  But because there are so many choices when it comes to deciding how much you wanna spend.  Bands and record labels are going nuts trying to get you to buy cd's by offering a dozen ways in which you can get the music.  Picking your format is just the beginning cause then you can get a shirt, or a shot glass, or toe nail clippers, or pretty much whatever you can think of that they can slap a logo on.  And stop stealing stuff online.  People gotta eat ya know.

    That concept has finally reached the toy world with the newest Alavaka release from Devils Head Productions and Scarecrowoven.  Both artists painted up the figures, while the latter's screen print and companion tshirt make up some incredible bundle deals.  All this will be available Friday, March 20th from http://devilsheadquarters.storenvy.com and http://scarecrowoven.bigcartel.com.

Suns of Brodarr: Jeff from Bwana Spoons x Toy Art Gallery



    This is Jeff.  Just Jeff.  He was made by a man named Bwana Spoons, which is probably not what his mamma named him in the hospital.  Though it might be, cause I see some pretty crazy names whenever I watch daytime tv.  Sometimes I think people name their kids based on a dare, or by just using whatever the last word they heard when the child was born.  Then they take it as a challenge to spell it in a way that no one would ever guess, even if the reward for doing so involved lots and lots of money.  Maybe they just had a bad experience with someone who asked them for their personal information once, and from that moment on they were determined to get revenge.  Or maybe it's all the beef hormones screwing with their ability to think clearly.  Everything can be traced back to beef hormones.  

    Mr. Spoons (if that is his real name) and Toy Art Gallery are unleashing this awesome figure upon the world today at noon pacific time.  Pick one up for yourself at www.toyartgallery.com.  But don't even think about renaming him; he is and always shall be Jeff.

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Blueberry from Kidrobot x Yury Ustsinau is Coming for Your Soul



    This thing kinda freaks me out.  It's like the alter ego of a serial killer terrorizing the Louisiana bayou.  And it's name is Blueberry, which is totally murderous.  If this was a movie, the main character would have stumbled upon this statue in a voodoo shop and being mysteriously drawn to it, is compelled to buy it.  After bringing it home the statue begins to take hold of his mind, transforming him into a monster.  He goes on a killing spree before finally being gunned down by a once skeptical cop and an oddly attractive nerd girl who figured out what was going on because of a sub thread on Reddit.  At the end of the film the statue is seen back in its place at the shop, appearing as if it never left.  And yet again, Hollywood has not called me.

    Of course this statue, however frightening you may find it, is just made of plastic that is most likely not infused with evil spirits.   It's the latest release from Kidrobot's Black collection and was designed by artist Yury Ustsinau (whose other work is equally effective at not making you want to be alone in the dark).  After spending a considerable amount of time floating on a cargo ship in the Pacific Ocean due to a labor dispute, this new centerpiece to your collection is finally ready to enter your home and possibly transform your psyche into that of an ancient demon/killer thingy.  But probably not really.

    Get one for yourself when they are released March 26th at www.kidrobot.com, Kidrobot locations, and your favorite designer toy stores.  

And Now For Something Completely Different: Cuddle Clones


    If you pay much attention to this site you have no doubt encountered pictures of my cats.  I have five of them, which is kind of mental, but I love them and they certainly make life interesting.  Without them, I wouldn't need to replace the carpet on my stairs, or have to investigate poop smells nearly as often!  See, every day is an adventure.   But in all seriousness, they are a lot of fun and I couldn't imagine life without them.

   People have gone to extremes to ensure their beloved critters will be with them forever, from actually cloning them to preserving their bodies through taxidermy.  Both are probably signs of some mental disorder and should be medicated accordingly, but I recently stumbled upon a company that takes the creepiness out of remembering your buddies for eternity. They're called Cuddle Clones and they make exact replicas of your pets in plush form.  You send them a bunch of pictures and they recreate the fuzz balls as adorable stuffed animals.  It's a neat way to keep your pets with you without scaring your human loved ones away.  Check em out at http://www.cuddleclones.com/.


Friday, March 13, 2015

Super7 San Diego's Grand Opening Is Tonight!


 
    You know how awesome it used to be when you could get in your car, drive around, and stumble upon awesome stores?  You'd have to think back quite awhile cause that time seems dead and gone.  Maybe not if you live in a city, but the suburbs are an endless wasteland of pizza shops and gas stations.  I don't know who is eating that much pizza, but you need the gas because you have to drive FOREVER to find any place cool to browse around.  When they build strip malls, is it mandatory that they fill them with boring crap?  Is there some law still on the books that regulates the necessary amount of dry cleaners each plaza must contain?  Would it kill them to put a antique/toy/convenience/laser tag emporium in every few?  I smell an appearance on Shark Tank coming up.

    If you perchance live in San Diego or the surrounding area, you are about to get a new favorite destination, as Super7 will be opening up their latest retail location tonight.  You should go and buy stuff to make yourself happy, buy stuff to make me happy, or just go and see if they have free nachos.  If you're not just there to fill up on snacks they will have an exclusive mixed parts Crystal Mecha for your collecting pleasure.  All the info you need is in the photo you see above.


Thursday, March 12, 2015

Special Friday the 13th Undead Geekwok Release from UME Toys


    I never trusted those Ewoks, cause nothing that cute should be able to take down the Galactic Empire.  They're tricky little teddy bears with an agenda they have yet to reveal.  What, you think they're content living in trees and catching random folks in nets ( who they were more than happy to barbeque if you'll recall).  I bet you they ate all the captive stormtroopers and probably sold their armor to cosplayers to fund their evil corporation they were working on.

    UME Toys is bringing out the Dark Side of these fuzzy critters with his Undead Geekwok.  Perfectly timed for a Friday the 13th release, each person that buys one of these undead nerds will be entered to win a clear version of the standard figure (sans dangling guts).  If you want one they will be up for sale tomorrow at 9pm London time only from http://umetoys.bigcartel.com.


Miscreation Toy's Iron Monster Gets the Mutant Vinyl Hardcore Treatment



    The other day I was watching the morning news and they had a bunch of kids on who had created some little robots that could kick a miniature ball into a net.  The newscasters were treating them like little geniuses but I know better.  Yeah, it may be cute that you could have a little game of soccer between a few critters made from the Radio Shack clearance bin, but this is how the end of the world starts.  Today they kick a ball, tomorrow it's human heads into overflowing trash cans.  Amazon wants to deliver stuff to our house using drones, but what happens when those drones decide that The Birds is an instructional film and decide to not carry our junk anymore?  You'll walk outside only to be swarmed by them.  I'm all for innovation, but not in ways that could turn on us, so those kids building robots should stick to the old baking soda volcano and just be quiet before I have to raise an army of bullies to infiltrate schools and keep these smart kids in check.  Every wedgie is one step closer to saving mankind, people!

    Look at this guy.  He probably started out like a cool robot butler or something and then got tired of taking our crap, thus becoming a literal killing machine.  And apparently he is in league with Satan, which just makes it all the worse.  Do we need devil worshipping robot butlers?   Not on my watch.  Luckily this guy is only made of plastic and doesn't have any of the components necessary to strangle you in your sleep.  This version of Miscreation Toy's Iron Monster was painted up by Mutant Vinyl Hardcore and will go on sale tomorrow (Friday the 13th no less).  He is limited to 10 pieces and will be available at 8pm eastern time through http://store.mutantvinylhardcore.com/.




Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Springtime Modzilla from Ron English x Toy Art Gallery



    Did you do your taxes yet?  I did, and boy could I have punched a baby afterwards.  I didn't get back what I thought I would and the accountant was all apologetic, then still charged me as much as she did last year when I was a baller.  How come I didn't get a sympathy discount?  They should charge on a sliding scale, not try to kick you while you're down.  She's lucky I didn't listen to N.W.A. on the ride over or things would have taken a more gangsta turn.  Just ask my wife, whenever she puts N.W.A. on in the car I am totally ready to get in a knife fight.

    If you did your taxes and are looking to invest in something, might I suggest toys?  They might not be good for your retirement, or building your kid's college fund, but they're more fun to look at than a stock portfolio.  Take this "Springtime" Modzilla from Ron English x Toy Art Gallery.  This mega lizard and his bunny friends are looking rather festive, like they're going on some really weird Easter Egg hunt.  Not that hunting for eggs can be but so strange, but if this dude were invited it's got to be an interesting time.  Pick one of these up when they go on sale today at noon pacific time from http://www.toyartgallery.com/.  Put it in your kid's Easter basket and scare the crap out of em.        

Monday, March 9, 2015

Hide Your Wife, Hide Your Kids Cause I'm Reviewing Business Monkey from Joe Ledbetter x Munky King




     Business Monkey has got a fist full of dollars burning his fingerprints off, and he wanted to get rid of them ASAP.  I tried to get him to play Shark Tank (I was even willing to let him be Mark Cuban) and invest in this new idea I had for edible dish cleaning sponges (the best food particles are going to waste, people), but he wasn't interested.  I could tell by the look in his eyes that he needed to get out of the house, to see where his riches could take him, so we gassed up the Hyundai and went on an adventure.  Where could we possibly go and spend that hard earned cash that was driving my simian companion so insane?


    Now it's about this point I had to stop taking pictures at the request of a giant doorman by the name of Tank who politely suggested I leave the camera in the car.  It was more the barbed wire tattoo around his neck that I spotted as soon as we parked, but there are more forms of communication than verbal am I right?  You don't stay alive as long as I have by not noticing these subtle details.  So while the pictures may be scarce, I'll do my best to relive the hijinks for you.

   It must have been a slow day because when we walked in we were immediately swarmed like we were making the routine gold delivery.  Coming in from the bright afternoon sun you need time for your eyes to acclimate to the much darker interior of the club, and thankfully for me Business Monkey laid a hand across my chest, cautioning me not to settle for a particular girl just yet.  Once my pupils had dilated I realized the favor he did me, because it looked like we were being attacked by extras from The Walking Dead.  Their sell-by-date having long passed, we pushed our way through and headed to the bar.  The bartender was a youngish man, maybe with a chromosomal issue, who after getting our drinks asked if we'd like to buy his new mix tape cause it's "hot fire".  Business Monkey was having none of it, and his financial-advising bird was more into classic rock anyway, so he gripped his wad of cash tighter as he nursed his drink.  A look of despair had fallen over his face, as if coming here had been nothing but a disappointment.  I was more concerned about the rat tugging at my laces in what was an obvious attempt to steal my shoes.  Suddenly, just when investing in my business start up was beginning to look like the better alternative, he spotted her.  

     The lonely, green-eyed beauty.  She cast a shy glance his way that sent his heart a flutter and blew a cool breeze through his stack of money.  He hopped up on the bar, sauntered over to her, and began searching her hair for bugs.  Her hair devoid of tasty insect snacks, he picked her hand up, kissed it, then showered her with good old fashioned American currency. Business Monkey feels no pain when he makes it rain! 

     Aren't adventures fun?  I think so, but I'm sure you're also curious what I think about the actual toy itself.  Having been a fan of Joe Ledbetter's work since I've been collecting designer toys, I feel this is one of the best representations of his work to date.  It's hard to explain, but it really captures the 2 dimensional aspects of his work in 3D.  More so than when his art appears on an existing platform toy. 



    His best toys are always the ones specifically designed with his art in mind, so you can properly appreciate the world in which they exist in his head.  And how can you go wrong with and angry monkey with a money hungry bird perched on his tail?  You can't, it's impossible.  

    Now you obviously need one of these guys to take on your own adventures to whatever hillbilly gentlemen's establishments exist where you live, so I'm gonna tell you how to get one.  This Thursday, March 12th, these suckers will go live on https://www.munkyking.com/ for your buying pleasure.  At only $90 each, they're a heck of a bargain cause they're freakin' huge.  For real, I had to clear off a gigantic space just to have somewhere to house him in between lap dances.  

    And you get a free box for your cat to sit in AT NO EXTRA CHARGE!  


  "The box could use more fart smells." - Jorah

Friday, March 6, 2015

Evenfall Strigoi Totemnaut from 3A



    Mankind is a curious creature.  We want to know everything, constantly improve the things we have, and explore every dark corner of our world and beyond.  Anyone who has ever entered an abandoned building to explore the decaying architecture only to run into a transient crack head will tell you: being a pioneer often times comes with a price.  Sometimes that price is trying not to let a filthy drug addict touch you, other times it is far greater.  

    I don't know what's ailing these astronauts, but it certainly looks contagious.  3A are the masters of toys that tantalize and horrify and these guys are firmly part of the latter.  The red Strigoi Totemnaut is a retailer exclusive, while the yellow will only be available through http://www.bambalandstore.com/.  Each one comes with a booklet written by Chris Ryall and illustrated by Ashley Wood, and will be available for purchase Monday, March 9th.  




Despair is Coming to Super Series Sunday from Tenacious Toys


   



    What a tantalizing headline!  Despair, in this case, is not a bad thing at all.  Sorry if you ran out to by sympathy cards for Tenacious Toys, but their Super Series Sunday is alive and well and will have a new release this weekend.  That release just happens to be a figure named Despair from Adam Quenell.  This little 3 inch dude is made out of keshi style rubber that's been dyed Tenacious blue and is limited to just 10 pieces.  Be one of the lucky few to own one when it goes on sale this Sunday, March 8th at www.tenacioustoys.com for $30.  And it comes with a code to download Adam's comedy album for free.  

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Hampstead Latex and French Two-Pack from 3A



    This could be the best movie ever.  A man on the run from the police for a crime he didn't commit stumbles into a fetish party to escape pursuit, when things go horribly wrong.  Shots are fired, people scramble, and the police think they finally have their man.  Not so fast though as he grabs the person closest to him as a hostage and makes his way through the Paris streets, trying to buy time to clear his name.  The woman in the red rubber cat suit not only becomes his biggest supporter, but the love of his life in...."So I Kidnapped a Girl from a Fetish Party But I Didn't Commit That Other Crime You're Accusing Me Of."

    Yeah the title needs a little work, but I think I have the basics down for a box office winner.  I just made all that crap up cause I can't quite read the small type under the picture, but I think I did an ok job.  The figures of 3A are easily to be inspired by and making up your own scenarios is half the fun.  You can grab this Hampstead Latex and French two-pack tomorrow (March 6th) exclusively at http://www.bambalandstore.com/ for $240.  

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Seafoam Pearl Merryners Set from Doubleparlour x Toy Art Gallery



    If you've ever been lucky enough to work retail in an area where bad winter weather happens then you have most likely experienced the phenomenon know as snow people.  While you may have never heard the term you have undoubtedly witnessed what it describes.  These are people that only come out on the worst, snowiest days in order to shop.  You will never have seen them before, they will resemble mutants, and they only make brief public appearances during storms.  You'll be leaning against the counter, complaining about how anyone with any sense would have closed their store by now and be safely at home, and in walks a gaggle of snow people.  Maybe they like to take advantage of uncrowded stores.  Maybe they like to only use their four wheel drive Mad Max vehicles under the most extreme conditions.  Maybe they all have warrants and assume the police will be busy pulling minivans out of ditches.  It's hard to say but they are real and they are giddy at the first sign of sleet.

    These Merryners figure from Doubleparlour x Toy Art Gallery look ready to slap on the snow tires and grab some bargains.  I'm not gonna lie, they kinda scare me in the same way I get twitchy if I have to wait in line at Wal Mart too long.  The longer you're there, the greater the chance you'll get bitten by some feral rat child.  I've seen it happen.

    And just like Wal Mart, I am able to look past being frightened when presented with an incredible bargain.  You could buy one of these 7 inch figures for $45, or get all four of em as a set for only $150.  That's a savings of $30 when you buy the set!  These go on sale today at noon pacific at http://shop.toyartgallery.com/.  

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

DC Vinyl Vixens Line from Funko



    
    Have you been watching Gotham?  I've been enjoying the show myself, as it's a much different take on the whole Batman universe than we're used to seeing.  The show has introduced just about every villain you can think of, though as of right now they are just strange little kids who have yet to realize their full psychopathic potential.  

    They're kind of deceiving, like these Vinyl Vixen figures from Funko's new Vinyl Sugar division.  Sure they look all innocent, but one day they'll leave a pile of bodies in their wake that's not nearly as metaphorical as those of the average woman.  All three of Batman's favorite ladies will available everywhere this month. 




Friday, February 27, 2015

Copper Modern Hero Bank from Mad Available Today!



    You know what's genius about this bank?  It's the same color as the only money I have.  These cats are expensive son.  I've never seen creatures eat the way they do, or that were as hell bent on destroying all my stuff.  I don't know what they're insistent on acting like your mom's second husband, but it's killing me financially.  I wouldn't even bother putting my money in this bank because by the time it hit the bottom it would already be spent on cat food or that fancy litter they insist upon that costs a day's wages per bag.  Can a brother get a telethon?  

    But this Modern Hero bank from Mad sure is pretty to look at, even if the only thing you're storing in it is dust.  It's a beast at 18 inches tall and this copper colorway is limited to only 30 pieces that go on sale today over at http://www.madtoystore.com/.  

Win A "Business Monkey" from Joe Ledbetter x Munky King Toys This Weekend



    You know what I got sitting on the shelf in front of me as a type this?  One of Joe Ledbetter's Business Monkeys from Munky King.  So how do I already have one and they're not even on sale yet?  I can't tell you all my secrets son, but what I can tell you is that this sucker is A-M-A-Z-I-N-G and you can get yourself one before anyone else this weekend as Munky King will be running an Instagram contest.  So if I were you, and I wanted a monkey with sound financial knowledge, I would go and follow Munky King on Instagram right now.  I'll be doing a proper review of this guy next week that may or may not include taking him somewhere that he can spend all those dollar bills in his hand.  Actually, I'm just gonna try and pay my credit card statement with them.  Gonna make it rain in Wal-Mart boooooooooooooy!!!!!

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Custom "Kings of Atlantis" Skulls from Clinton Yaws x Argonaut Resins



    So this morning I woke up to surprise snow.  Nowhere in any weather report that I watched this week did it say it was gonna snow here, but that sure didn't stop a few inches of the stuff from making driving a challenge as I took my wife to work.  I know that meteorology is supposed to be a science but I'm not buying into that any more.  No one's perfect, but every time it has snowed this winter it has either been a complete surprise or the amounts were so drastically different than what the weather people said that I could have just asked one of my cats.  I think that it's all a conspiracy and that meteorology is nothing more than an amateur form of witchcraft.  I think after they invented names for the clouds they just gave up and started casting bones and gazing into scrying glasses.  And let us not forget the big deal that they make about a ground rodent seeing his shadow and predicting when spring will come. Science, are you there?  I'm gonna go and catch a weather person and see if they float when I dunk them into the lake.  

    The beautifully painted resin of these Kings of Atlantis skulls probably hold some secrets of their own, but hopefully they're a bit more accurate that channel 10.  Argonaut Resins enlisted the help of Clinton Yaws to bring these to "life" (Get it, cause skulls are a symbol of death, lol.  Oh morbid puns you slay me!  I did it again!!!)  My favorite is the Easy Rider one cause I like that movie a lot and it seemed like everyone was having a good time in it until the end, which is oddly the point when good times usually go bad.   And you can't beat a movie where motorcycles are just as important as the main actors, though I did thoroughly enjoy wacky Jack Nicholson.  

    These bad boys go on sale tomorrow, Friday the 27th, at noon eastern time only at http://argonautresins.bigcartel.com/.  

Earth Shattering Toy Review Extravaganza Featuring "Bitch" from Luke Chueh x Munky King


    


    You're gonna wanna go ahead and click on that video you see there to set the proper mood for this toy review baaaaaaaaaaaaaby.  That's right, just move your cursor over to the play button, press it, and let the smooth sounds of Marvin Gaye prepare you for what it sure to be the greatest, and I mean greatest, thing you will see all day.  Are you ready?  Is your soul in the mood for love?  If you said "yes" then I'm gonna need you to scroll down a little further so the festivities can begin....



    Oh dang,  you didn't see that coming did you?  But to each his own I suppose, cause these wolves shouldn't be ashamed of how they express their love, even if it's more Lil Wayne than Marvin Gaye.  You've never seen a toy like the one that Luke Chueh and Munky King have created here.  Provocative is the first word that comes to mind, which is not a bad thing by any means, because most of the time good art is exactly that.  And being that this toy is taken directly form one of Luke's paintings (you can kind of see it on the box in the back round) it captures all of the meaning that the original work had.  Now, what that meaning is I have no idea, but that's not gonna stop me from sharing the one's I came up with:

 - The larger wolf could be the IRS while the smallest one represents my disappointment at my refund this year

-  Or he could be the government in general, who has labeled us all as sheep and who takes great pleasure in metaphorically screwing us at every turn 

- They could be a perfectly normal couple who have decided to spice up their relationship by playing dress up (I always try to get my wife to dress up as Margaret Thatcher when she cooks dinner.  That's probably more to do with a head injury I suffered as a youth football player though)

    What I dig about this toy is that it pushes boundaries of what a designer toy should be.  It's kinda cool to have to think a little bit beyond whether or not something is cute while at the same time having to look past whatever awkwardness we may feel about our in-laws knowing there are two plastic wolves makin puppies on our entertainment centers.  The term "art multiple" gets thrown around a lot when describing designer toys but there are very few that I could expect to see for sale in the gift shop of a modern art museum.  I think this one fits that bill, from the toy itself to the slim packaging.   

   Now I know some of you may want to buy this toy cause you like it but fear having to explain to your young children exactly what's going on here.  I get that your house may be more Disney than National Geographic, so I have taken the liberty of utilizing the convenient 3 piece construction to create two alternate scenes you can use to avoid all birds and bees talk:


   In this scenario, two wolf friends are attending comic con.  One has chosen to dress up as his favorite character Super Sheep, while the other has just complained the whole time about waiting in line.  While  rushing to get to the next long line the crabby wolf trips over someone's fake sword and falls on his face, much to the hilarity of his costumed friend.  End scene.


    In this next one, the two wolves and the sheep are enjoying a festive spring break at the Jersey Shore, when all of a sudden one of them makes eye contact with some meathead's girlfriend.  Having just downed a protein shake and 13 shots, the meathead delivers a brutal uppercut to the one wolf, while his friends get ready to do battle.  So many spray tans were ruined that night.  End scene.  

    Those are just two quick ones for you, but the possibilities are endless!  And they're also interchangeable with all of the other editions, so you can mix and match em however you like.  This original version (that takes its color scheme directly from the painting) will be available early in March from www.munkyking.com.  They are limited to 500 pieces and will retail for $69 (I see what you did there you cheeky little monkeys).  

    




Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Yellow and Black Marbled Nadsat Boy from Kenth Toy Works x Toy Art Gallery



    I love the look of marbled vinyl.  It's all trippy looking like one of those Bill Graham posters from the 1960's.  Couldn't you see this guy on a sign outside the Fillmore, with Jefferson Airplane's name all distorted as it filled in the space around him?  



I'm just gonna leave this right here.

    Speaking of all things psychedelic, I worked with a guy who had a friend who decided he wanted to expand his mind by taking acid.  He ended up kicked out of college after he tore all of the drywall down in his dorm room and ate the insulation because he thought it was cotton candy.  I don't think a trip to the emergency room was the kind of trip he had in mind.

   Back to that beautiful toy specimen.  Nadsat Boy is the creation of Kenth Toy Works and Toy Art Gallery and will be available today at noon pacific time over at http://www.toyartgallery.com/.  And kids, don't do drugs.  They're a waste of good toy money.  

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Tenacious Toys Exclusive Blue "Inner Child" from Nerviswr3k x Suburban Vinyl



    Why so blue panda bear?  Cause he's a Tenacious Toys exclusive, duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh.  It's kind of their thing, which I'm all about because I like consistency.  I like to know that I will never get a full night's sleep because one of the cats will knock something over, scare the others into a feline stampede, and ensure that I nearly have a heart attack.  I like to wake up in the morning and know that I have a delicious box of Cap'n Crunch waiting for me.  I like to think that if I mention how delicious Cap'n Crunch is two sentences in a row that maybe they'll send me some free cereal cause that stuff ain't cheap.  I'd like free cereal to become a consistency.

    It feels like just last week that I wrote a pretty baller review of Nerviswr3k's "Inner Child" figure.  Actually, it was just last week, so if you missed it you won't have to scroll too far back in the archives to bask in it's glory.  But before you bask, or afterwards if you promise to come back, you should know that this little monster is limited to only 125 pieces and will be on sale starting February 28th at noon eastern time only from http://www.tenacioustoys.com/.  They will have the red version available as well.  This toy was produced by the fine folks at Suburban Vinyl

Monday, February 23, 2015

Ferg x Grody Shogun x Scott Wilkowski "Infected Young Gohst" Preorder


 
    Did you know the yuck that causes pink eye can live on a surface for a month?  I only know this because it's an occupational hazard where I work; one which I've been fortunate enough to avoid.  Of course, pink eye is not the worst thing you can contract from another person, but it's pretty gross.  No wants to wake up with their eye crusted shut and looking like the weeping dead.

    I don't know what would cause something like this to happen to you, but I'm sure Jenny McCarthy will tell you not to vaccinate against it.  Who would have thought some idiot television personality wasn't in fact the utmost authority when it came to infectious diseases?  Crazy.

    Ferg and Grody Shogun's Young Gohst is looking like he may need a trip to ye old apothecary to get a tube of ointment.  Anything you need a tube of ointment for just sounds like the grossest thing possible doesn't it?  I don't know what ails him, but it looks contagious.  This resin figure has been given the "infected" treatment from Scott Wilkowski and is available for preorder right now from Lulubell Toy Bodega.  You have until March 1st at 9am pacific time to secure yourself one for $70.  Maybe if you lick it you'll build up your immune system.

Friday, February 20, 2015

Toy Art Gallery Presents: "Dichotomy" This Saturday





    Have you ever heard the saying " two heads are better than one"?  I can guarantee you they weren't talking about someone with an unborn calcified fetal twin.  Not that I've even met anyone that has suffered from that condition, which is probably for the best.  I don't really know how to behave myself when I find out something like that.  I would totally turn into Larry King and grill the person like they were testifying before congress.  I can't help it because medical anomalies fascinates me and I want to know everything I can find out.  And then there's the whole question of how well you have to know a person before you try to buy the thing from them. I've said too much.

    Having two heads doesn't necessarily mean you'll be undergoing a surgical procedure or relegated to a life of sideshow performances.  It could just be the main feature of a awesome toy, like Doublethink from artist Takahiro Komuro and Toy Art Gallery.  Some of the best toy customizers in the world have come together to offer their unique interpretations to this hunk of vinyl, and you can see the results tomorrow night when Dichotomy opens from 7-10pm.   Here's a list of the participating artists: