Jon Malmstedt is moving his Rampage Toys operation from Japan back to the United States and his first stop is gonna be at New York Comic Con. He'll have a ton of exclusives available at the Tenacious Toys booth # 309 and these are just some of what you'll be able to score. He'll also be bringing more with him when he makes an appearance on Saturday. Check out the pictures and start saving your lunch money. Or steal someone else's and that way you can eat and have money too. That makes more sense.
You need proof that times are still tough? I made a joke in a post once about selling a kidney and I got legitimate solicitations from a dude in Africa willing to act as the surgeon/middle man. He sent me a link to his clinic's website which had a surprising number of goats wandering around outside of what was termed "the operating room." Now call me a germaphobe if you will, but one goat inside a hospital is really one too many if you think about it. And I love goats and would be excited to see one just about anywhere else that didn't involve putting a gaping wound in my body. Plus airplanes are uncomfortable enough as it is without trying to recover from major surgery on one, unless they started stocking those little drink carts with morphine when I wasn't looking, but I doubt it. They won't even give you the full can of soda, like that extra bit is gonna bankrupt them.
Being broke doesn't mean you have to be depressed all the time. Just check out this Hooverville Labbit from Frank Kozik and Kidrobot. Dude may be traveling down a rough path but he's just happy to be alive and doing his best to keep a positive outlook on his future. He's available right now in a vintage colorway and in blazing Technicolor orange that can be found exclusively on www.kidrobot.com.
I just wanted to take a moment and say thank you to everyone who nominated me to be a finalist in The Designer Toy Awards and for voting for me to win as Best Blog. I found out about the nomination while I was traveling all last week so I didn't have access to do a proper post about it, but I am beyond grateful for all of your support. While it would be very cool to win, the greatest reward a writer can ever receive is having others read their work and enjoy it and everyday I am beyond thankful for that. Jesus, that was sappy. And it's not like I couldn't go back and edit a fart joke in there somewhere rather than go on a stream of consciousness rant where I type everything I'm thinking. I should probably go take a shower before my wife comes home from work so I can at least fake some form of productivity today. This is kinda like when you know you have to be up early for something important so you try real hard to go to sleep and you try to clear your mind of any thoughts but then you start wondering what it is about jazz music that is appealing to people and the next thing you know you didn't sleep at all and you have to try not to hallucinate while you're doing your important thing but then you kinda nod off and have one of those half asleep/half awake dreams and you're not sure if you just yelled something really dumb out loud or it was just part of the dream. What were we talking about again?
SAAAAAAAATUUUUUUUUUURDDAAAAAAAAAYYY!!!!! Did you read that in your head like I was about to announce a monster truck rally, because if you did you are awesome and we are friends. I got way too pumped listening to a song from the new Darkthrone album and now I'm just trying to type out all these rage feelings I've got and turn them into something informative for you. Did you know that the dude from Darkthrone accidentally got himself elected to his town's council in Norway after he posted a picture of himself with his cat and said "don't vote for me?" I wish he was eligible to be our president instead of those two other clowns.
Change I can believe in.
Splurrt is dropping some more Cadaver Kids and Mecha Cadaver Kids through Lulubell Toy Bodega on Saturday and this time they're all mixed up. I'm usually not a huge mixed parts fan but the colors he chose are so different on these that I dig em. They will be $50 and $55 respectively and will go on sale promptly at noon pacific time (September 17th) only from www.lulubelltoys.com. These will be gone in the blink of an eye so forget whatever else you were planning on doing and camp your behind in front of a computer ready to pull the trigger.
Brothers and sisters, can I get a moment of silence for every other toy in your collection. Cause the moment you put this stunning piece of work next to them they will all straight die, r.i.p. This is not only by far the most amazing paint job I've seen on Candie Bolton's Bake-Kujira to date, but this is my favorite on a toy I've seen in a long time. It looks like a mysterious antique you would find in a dead relative's attic who during their lifetime was a world traveller and collector of artifacts. Inside would be contained the spirit of some mythological creature peacefully at rest until the time you were able to decipher the text written on the underside. Never decipher any text written on the underside of anything unless you are prepared to deal with the consequences. I believe mythological creatures fall under the same leash law as dogs, so keep that in mind.
This figure is so amazing that Toy Art Gallery is holding a lottery just for the chance to purchase one. You know you want to enter, because if you don't there will always be this void you feel inside of you that is impossible to fill. No one needs that, so here's how you do it:
ETHEREAL APPARITION Edition retails for $250 and will be released via email lottery starting on Friday, Sept. 16th at 12PM PST and ending on Monday, Sept. 19th at 12PM PST. Email sales@toyartgallery.com with “Bake-Kurjira Lottery” as the subject along with your paypal address and shipping info. If selected you will be sent an invoice for payment. Please allow 24 hours for a response after the closing time (Monday 12PM PST). Winners will be chosen at random, one entry per participant please (if you submit more than once you will be disqualified). Good luck!
Seriously, this thing is so beautiful that I'm at a loss. I will however go ahead and call this my favorite toy of the year. Yeah, I know there's still a few months yet but that's how secure I am in my opinion. I don't flip flop like a politician, but I do accept gifts/bribes/spiritual offerings and this would be a perfect place to start your shopping.
Let me tell you, when I was a wee lad there was nothing better than finding a good stream and taking all of my GI Joe figures there to play. I'd spend hours refining the landscape and setting up epic battles and just the thought of it makes me want to go outside and do it again. How come it's taboo for a grown man to want to play with action figures? I bet the world would suck a lot less if we did. Hell, we've convinced adults that coloring books are therapeutic, so why can't you play with toys outside without the neighbors thinking you're a freak?
There's only so many times that you can take Cobra Commander to jail, allow him to be rescued, and start the whole process all over again before you start to question his abilities as an evil villain. That's where The Worst come in. They are comprised of the most sinister evil doers known to mankind and are ready to tear things up. But I know you can't choose just one of these bad bros from Super7 to add to your collection, and on Wednesday, September 14th just before the stroke of midnight you won't have to. Because you can get all six carded figures for only $90. These things demand to be opened and played with, so you'll probably want two sets so you can continue to admire the killer artwork by Ed Repka in their original, unspoiled state. Get em at www.super7store.com.
New...Day Pops! New...Day Pops! Oh, don't you dare be sour cause these New Day Funko Pop! Vinyl figures are up for preorder right now!!!!! Sold exclusively through Toys R US, this three pack featuring your WWE world tag team champions is set to release the first week in October, but you can secure your set right now, with free shipping in the US, by visiting this link. Not owning them would be booty to the highest degree. Booty to the nth power. So booty that you could not recover from it, as there is no known cure for terminal bootyitis. So if you don't get them go ahead and alert your loved ones now so they can make your final arrangements. This whole thing just took a really dark turn.
You know who doesn't decorate their walls? Weirdos. I bet Ted Bundy never put so much as a Jimi Hendrix poster on his wall and look where that got him. Luckily for you I am here to help you avoid traveling down that same dark road by telling you about this killer (no pun intended) poster from Frank Kozik. This is of course inspired by his epic "Labbit the Barbarian" collaboration with the late great Frank Frazetta, which is the most manly piece of vinyl this side of a Manowar record.
Old Spice has taken it too far.
Increase your property value when this print goes on sale later today through www.kidrobot.com.
Oh my goodness I know ya'll got paid today and are trying to get rid of that dirty cash cause that stuff is filthy and there isn't enough hand sanitizer in the world to clean those kinda germs but you can't just spend it on anything lame like school supplies so I'm here to help. See, I'm pretty much an expert in making other people money and also helping them spend it. Neither is a great mutant power, which is why the X-Men never return my calls, but their loss is your gain cause then I have time to find things like this for you. I also haven't slept for days.
Look how pretty that swirly pink vinyl is on these Stingy Jack and Calliope figures. And it's not just decorative, cause those suckers glow in the dark! It's an added bonus that will hopefully intrigue your cats while you're trying to sleep at night so they stop biting your toes. You can get these two figures from Brandt Peters and Kathie Olivas when they go on sale later today at noon pacific time from www.circusposterus.com or n person at Stranger Factory. They're limited to just 32 pieces of each, which is nuts.
I just posted about this a few days ago and the gods have shown their favor towards you as preorders have now started for this killer figure. The world's of Jason Freeny and Bigshot Toyworks collide in the most metal creature to ever stand guard over your vegetable patch...RAGNAR!!!! Only 200 pieces exist of this beautifully dissected bro in this colorway and he's only $65, which is a steal for something this brutal. Seriously, he's more brutal than what your mom's meatloaf does to my digestive track whenever I visit. Woman needs to learn about take out.
Secure him for your collection by visiting this link.
When I heard the phrase "Gold Life" I had images of living like a rap star with gold teeth and chains and maybe a 24k platted car that would one day get repossessed cause of that nightclub incident and the ensuing lawsuit that wiped out my fortune. Of course I would make a pretty gangsta comeback by doing commercials for strip mall colleges that help you becomes a medical assistant and by being a clue on Jeopardy, all of which will rebuild my street cried and lead to my resurrection tour and my ability to catch up on my child support payments which the judge wouldn't lower even when times were tough. Then soon after once I have regained my former glory I will OD on Sprite and cough syrup and then my hologram will go on tour and I'll keep releasing albums that were supposedly recorded before I died but I'm just low key dropping tracks from the grave because the peace from death has given me mad time to reflect and tighten my lyrical approach. Not that I've thought this through or anything.
In reality The Gold Life is a a world created by Huck Gee that is way more feudal Japan than early '90's Compton. The first three figures from this new series are being produced by Mighty Jaxx and are available for preorder right now from just about anywhere that sells designer toys. There's three different figures and at only $25 each it would be a crime not to get them all. Not like a felony or anything, but still a crime.
I was reading that the other day in Iceland a road crew had to go out and unearth a boulder they accidentally covered up because it pissed off the elves and they were taking their frustrations out on anyone who got close. Not only did they dig it back up but they also pressure washed it to restore it to its former glory. That would never happen in America because first we would have people fighting on Facebook as to whether the elves existed or not. Then some idiot bureaucrat would figure out how much they owed the country in back taxes and send them a bill. Congress would probably pass legislation about which bathrooms they would be allowed to use, and people would have hunted them and made elf taxidermy earrings to sell on Etsy and none of this would have really been an issue to begin with because we would have taken their elven lands and put a strip mall there a long time ago. I think I was meant to live in Iceland.
I love the elves and their gnome kinfolk. And I love black metal. And I love anatomical gross stuff. Has Bigshot Toyworks been camping out in my mind in an effort to create the perfect hybrid toy featuring all of my interests? If somehow they could have worked cats and cable tv in I would have straight died of shock. Not only is this metal loving gnome dude finally becoming a reality, but Jason Freeny has hacked off a section of him to let us all see his inner self. This is the type of brutality that anyone starting a black metal band should aspire to, as setting fires and wearing corpse paint just isn't gonna cut it after seeing this.
Only 200 pieces of this dude will exist in the world and they will be up for preorder very very soon and also available at New York Comic Con and Designer Con it seems. Keep up to date by checking out www.gnome.world.
"We're crab people now." It's a simple, yet powerful quote from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia that is uttered by Charlie as he harvests sewage runoff crustaceans from the Delaware River. He had planned to sell them on the street, until Frank gets a government bailout and the plan is abandoned. Sharon and I have since used it to refer to any get-rich-quick scheme we come up with or when we're depressed and feeling rather destitute. Abraham Lincoln never had any quotes that versatile.
Hopefully we'll never have to say it because we've actually grown giant claws in response to all of the beef hormones in our food, but it's nice to know that it's there in case we mutate. Cop A Squat Toys has painted up a bunch of these crab looking dudes from Studio Kabuto and will be releasing them on his website Thursday, September 1st at 9pm eastern time.
Prepare yourselves to be wrapped in the luxury that is marbled soft vinyl. Allow your eyes to indulge in the subtle variations in color that enhance the beautiful sculpt of Candie Bolton's Bake-Kujiru figure. You may ask yourself whether you are worthy of such earthly delights. Even if you aren't, that's no reason to pass up this extremely limited release, because just having it in your presence could change your life for the better. Flowers will smell better, kittens will feel softer, and that weird noise your plumbing is making will seem less like an impending issue and more like a symphony your house is playing just for you.
Available this Friday, September 2nd at 6pm eastern time from www.candiebolton.com. Limited to only 9 pieces.
Go ahead and tell me the plots of the Avengers movies. I'll wait.
See, you can't do it, but its not your fault. Scientists have proven that if Scarlett Johansson is prancing around in a skin tight costume that 95% of people have no ability to recall anything else that is happening. Hollywood has used this technique to slip tons of movies that have no redeeming value past us and all we're left with is a little less money in our bank accounts and a two hour window of our lives thats blacked out. A small price to pay I suppose. And it's not like the Avengers films were bad, but I guess they didn't want to risk it just in case.
3A is continuing their line of Marvel figures with the ever dangerous Black Widow. Lucky for you the presale for her doesn't start until Wednesday, August 31st, so you haven't missed out yet on securing this purrty lady for your collection. Woo her at http://www.bambalandstore.com.
Josh Mayhem is known for transforming existing Dunnys into wind swept works of craziness through heavy doses of resin, paint, and magic spells. But what if he were to customize clear resin Dunnys with even more resin. It's like crazy resin inception, or maybe even more fitting would be to put a picture of Xhibit here with a certain caption that would adequately describe his philosophy on Pimp My Ride:
Yeah, that's more like it. These things are nuts and you could be one of 12 lucky folks in the world to add one to your collection when they go on sale Thursday, August 25th at 10am (that's today, sucka). Try your luck at snagging one from http://www.joshmayhem.com. May the favor of the toy gods shine down on you.
Pokemon Go has spread faster than the clap at a trucker convention and has consumed everyone's life like they left it untreated. There's been stories about people walking around, intent on catching some cute little Japanese critter and instead catching the grill of an oncoming Ford Focus or even stumbling upon a dead body. Whatever the appeal is it seems to be thus far the greatest mind control device ever utilized by the federal government (they're always watching) and so in the spirit of that I've come up with different games that puts this technology to use and will therefore make me rich beyond my wildest dreams. And my dreams are not PG13 ya hear? So without further ado:
1.). To Catch a Predator Go: It combines everyone's favorite game show, To Catch a Predator, with a mobile app. Are they hiding behind your bushes? Are they lurking behind a seemingly too good to be true Craigslist ad? Just point your phone they're way and identify all the creepers you can and see who can fill up the sex offender registry quickest. For ages 10 and up.
2.) Poltergeist Go: This is for those agoraphobics out there who want to enjoy a fun game while feeling safe and secure in their own homes. Just walk around your house and hunt for restless souls. Will they be friendly, or will they be malevolent ghosts who wish to inflict the pain of their untimely deaths on the living? Part of the fun is not knowing! Also works as a good tool to get you back out into the world cause your house is haunted and you probably won't feel safe there any longer. Not sure if it counts as therapy or not but I would try to get your insurance company to reimburse you.
3.) They Live! Go: Use this app to step into the wrestling boots of Rowdy Roddy Piper and figure out if the people close to you are really aliens hell bent on world domination. Then you can annihilate them! ( in the game of course, as I will not be held responsible for you "removing" the very real threat to human existence and any legal ramifications that may arise thereafter).
As you can see, the possibilities are limited only by the imagination. For those of you who don't get the concept of catching little monsters and making them fight each other for your own sick amusement, allow this English girl to explain it all to you:
There's lots of rules that you should abide when it comes to underwear. For one, don't buy it second hand. If you're gonna buy anything new it should be the garment that touches your sensitive bits. Those deals at the Goodwill are pretty awesome, especially when certain color tags are on sale, but treat yourself and make yours the first booty to reside in your britches. Oh and the words "man" and "thong" should never be allowed to coexist. Those are really the only two rules I can think of, but I'm sure there more and they are just as valid.
This dude from Plaseebo has the best hand gesture going on, as if he's trying to say "I pay my bills and I'm of legal voting age, so what are you gonna do about it if I don't feel like wearing pants." It's an argument that's easier to win versus your wife than the police, let me tell you. This one of a kind figure comes packed with a motion activated LED light so his underpants party can continue well into the night. Welcome him into your home when he goes on sale Wednesday August 24th at www.plaseebo.net.
I haven't seen Suicide Squad yet because I am cheap and my wife is violent towards unruly strangers, but I heard a lot of folks complaining about it because the Joker is supposedly not in it much. Instagram has lead me to believe that no one cared about any other character than Harley Quinn and studies have shown that you are seperated by no more than five degrees from a girl dressed up as Ms. Quinn, which doesn't make me upset by any means. Now the Joker on the other hand looks like he's gonna be slinging nitrous balloons at this year's Gathering of the Juggalos, and that's way more frightening than anything my heart can withstand. So maybe it's good his screen time is limited to a digestible amount. Not that I'll have a real opinion until it's on DVD and I can trick someone in to letting me borrow it.
There are other characters being released by Mighty Jaxx and Jason Freeny this weekend, but Harley is my boo, so it's the only one I really want. You can grab her and her other 4 inch tall compadres this Saturday, August 20th at 10 am eastern time from www.mightyjaxx.rocks. Id it too early to start begging for Christmas presents?
Are you going to New York Comic Con? I'm going, and my wife is going, and I hope like the last two years we ride the train into New York sitting next to the Honkey Tonk Man and the one dude from The Bushwackers. Seriously, we pulled into Penn Station and both of them were standing behind us two years in a row. Being an old school wrestling fan I was pretty stoked but resisted acting like a complete weirdo, except for the fact that both times I pointed and very loudly proclaimed "it's the Honky Tonk Man" in a southern accent that came out of nowhere. I regret nothing.
Kidrobot is also going to New York Comic Con and will have a booth there filled with exclusives. If you're attending as well you can preorder all three of these figures so you can pick em up at the con without having to worry that they may sell out. I'm gonna preorder that little Scott Tolleson Cthulhu Dunny jawn for sure, and most likely the Brandt Peter's one too cause I know I'll be kicking myself if I don't. That thing is nuts looking.
You can read about all the rules and regulations at blog.kidrobot.com so that you ensure you don't miss out on these. And visit them during the con at booth # 502.
I am currently committing the cardinal sin of literature by reading the Game of Thrones series after having seen the show. Say what you will, but there was no way I was gonna finish the book series before caving and watching the show. Some internet meme would have slipped past my defenses and ruined a pivotal occurrence and I would have been pissed. Thus far the two are matching up pretty well so I'm hopeful that trend will continue as I get further into the story. Don't spoil it or I'll hit you.
Threezero are continuing their ridiculously detailed Game of Thrones line with what has turned out to be a very complex character; The Hound. Don't worry, I won't spoil it for the four of you that don't watch it, but dude isn't just a chargrilled face. There are two different versions of this killer with the heart of imitation gold, as the one offered as an exclusive to threezero will come with his killer dog helmet. It's only a couple of bucks more, so do the right thing and spring for it otherwise there will be regret, and regret is an emotion that will get you killed on the field of battle. I take this very seriously.
Sharon and I went to one of those Chiller Theatre shows in North Jersey many years ago where they have lots of weird celebrities show up to sign things and tables filled with all sorts of collectibles to buy. We were walking down the hallway just taking it all in when we see this mass of people coming towards us taking pictures but we couldn't see who the object of their attention was. We get closer and in the middle of this group stood Pee Wee Herman, dressed completely in character, doing the voice and everything. He was on his way to wherever he was signing autographs and we just happened to be there. Yeah, it's not the best story but it's the only one I have. Oh, and maybe ten years later my wife finally saw Pee Wee's Big Adventure for the first time, so there's that. I'll just sit here and wait for the publishers to come to me for this one.
Dead Greedy made me a little nervous when I opened his email, because a Pee Wee/He-Man mash-up was not the first thing I thought of when I read Her-Man. I thought maybe one of the best loved characters from my childhood had decided through surgical means to pursue the gender he always felt he was inside. But alas, I am safe from those conflicted feelings as this is the result of some parallel universe on tv where beloved shows blend together in bizarre fashion.
You can own one of these handmade carded figures by visiting www.deadgreedy.com.
Well, between the title of this post and the two photos listing the event info and participating artists, there's not a lot left for me to say about Black Drove. Just look at the names on the flyer below and tell me there's anything else I can do to convince you that this is the place to be on August 27th. I don't even have anything sarcastic to say, which is weird cause that's kinda my thing. Just get your funds together and go and buy some amazing work. The judge will understand if you have to cut your ankle monitor off.
I could have sworn when I was preparing my extensive research about these (aka reading my emails) that the price must be a typo. You can get a handmade Skelevex figure, with custom artwork from British graffiti dude Hoakser, and it will only run you about $19 plus shipping? I feel like this should be a late night tv infomercial and I should be telling you how this is once in a lifetime deal, and people that don't take advantage of it will tell their grandkids how they could have left them one in their will but they were too lame to pull the trigger. Don't be the person that has to look at the disappointed face of their grandchild.
These little dudes are killer and look like they were just plucked fresh from that particular section of town that you always see on the morning news. Snatch one up for yourself by visiting http://skelevex.bigcartel.com on Saturday, August 13th at 6pm bst.
If I owned this toy I would reply to any of my wife's questions that need to be answered in the affirmative by whipping this sucker out and yelling "DYNO MITE" just like JJ from Good Times because I am all about pushing boundaries and living like the rebel I am. Eventually she will get tired of it and hide it from me, which will force my hand into finding some new way to establish the proper level of awesome for which I am entitled as an American. You don't need Monster Energy drinks when you are filled with the spirit of Kenny Powers. I totally just power watched Eastbound and Down and was way more inspired by it than I should have been.
Munky King is releasing the latest Trouble Trouble figure from Dabs Myla in black on black with a wee bit o gold for some spice. If you want one you can get it at noon pacific time today from www.munkyking.com. Put it on a plate, cover it in birdseed, and finally nail that pesky roadrunner once and for all.
If a cyclops has two heads does that mean he can see in stereo? Does he, or they, have depth perception or the ability to see in 3D? Will their separate brains converge for the sole purpose of being able to view that bad art that was popular in the '90's that you had to squint to see and it was always a sailboat? See, that's why Ray Harryhausen made his cyclops with only one head so he didn't spend sleepless nights worrying about these things.
Planet X have been teasing us for what seems like forever with this beast and the time has finally come for you to own one. If you're lucky that is, cause you have to enter and win a lottery just for the chance to buy this beautiful sofubi creature. Here's how you do it:
To enter lottery, please send the following information to info@planetx.asia from NOW till Aug 14, 2016 (24:00 HKT)
1. Name 2. Shipping Address 3. Country 4. Phone Number 5. PayPal Account 6. Instagram / Facebook ID
How come the enamel pin thing didn't blow up while the people at TGI Fridays were forced to wear flair on their suspenders? You'd think that with those restaurants and all those folks needing pins that the market would have responded accordingly. But nope, now they just wear polo shirts with no hint of their personality or what they're really about and the pin game is stronger than ever. I for one am not into eating crappy food served by people who all look like extras from 1984, so bring back the flair and stop feeding us your agenda of conformity and indigestion, TGI Fridays, if that is your real name.
When Josh Divine isn't dreaming up craziness for Kidrobot he's out there doing his own thing in the art world, like making his Alley Kids series of pins. The latest is Alexis, who is a rocker girl who is waaaaaaay more Joan Jett than Avril Lavigne and would bring love to bring a heavy dose of sass to your jean jacket. Get her right now by checking out www.alley-kids.com.
We all have two sides: one that's light and fluffy and wants to hugs baby duckies and laugh at Tina Fey movies, and one that's dark and brooding and wants to listen to Slayer and kick people in the face. Sometimes one rises up to cancel the other out. Sometimes they both remain even and you flip flop between the two. It's just basic human nature, but according to my lawyer it is not a valid excuse for throwing out a request to appear for jury duty. That sounds like some University of Phoenix Law School thinking to me and I've gotta do better when picking legal representation on Craigslist.
Don't be ashamed of either of your personalities; instead celebrate them with the help of Cop a Squat Toys. He's ready to release two new editions of his popular Fumetsu figures in the form of the brightly colored Summer's End and the mysteriously evil Dark Arts sets. Each figure is sold individually for $80 a pop. There won't be many to go around, so be ready when they are on Tuesday, August 9th, at 2pm eastern time only from http://www.copasquattoys.com.
I know you thought Bedazzling your toy shelves was gonna elevate your collection to a whole nother tax bracket, but that's not the way to do it. You've gotta raise the caliber of the collection itself and what better way to do that than with porcelain. And no one does porcelain like K. Olin Tribu,
who have teamed up with Medicom to create this stunning 400% Bearbrick.
You can preorder one right now by clicking on the link to the right of this post. Your friends will be impressed and your family will probably think you have extra money to lend them now that you're so fancy.
